Episode Report Card Demian: A | 210 USERS: B- YOU GRADE IT Big Gay Chris Went To 2026, And All I Got Was This Lousy Headache
By Demian | Season 6 | Episode 10 | Aired on 2003.11.23
He spins on his heel and exits as the Dolt shoots A Look at the others. He believes Big Chris is lying, but Raige opines he hasn't any reason to do so. The Dolt asks Phoebe if her Fucking Backup Band picked anything up, but Phoebe admits she "could never sense anything" from Big Chris. There's a contemplative pause, after which Piper asks her ex-husband what he's thinking. "If we can figure out who she is," he replies, referring to LesBianca, "we might be able to figure out who Chris is." Raige slams the Book shut and bails, claiming that they'll never figure anything out until they have more to go on, and reminds them they'll know where to find her if they need her. Phoebe rises from the sofa to leave as well. "You're just going to let them go?" the Dolt splutters, crossing to Piper. "What do you want me to say?" she replies. "They have lives, too. Besides, what more can we do?" The Dolt gestures to the Book and blithers about research as the doorbell rings. He orbs off to answer it, instructing Piper to remain in the attic to work on the LesBianca issue. Piper realizes who might be at the door, and bolts from the divan to race down the stairs.
Down in the main hall, the Dolt orbs in by the front door and opens it to find yet another of trampy Paris Hilton's former boyfriends lounging on the porch. This would be Fireman Greg, as played by Jason Shaw, and to be honest, Piper should have stuck with Darling Derek from last week or that scruffy guy from her pointless subplot a few episodes ago, because those guys? Were hot. This loser? Not so much, and besides, I'm sure he's still crawling with Hilton cooties even now, three years after they broke up. Awkwardness ensues as the Dolt realizes that Greg's there to escort Piper out on the town for the evening. Piper bustles up to make the formal introductions, and Fireman Greg's pretty easygoing about meeting the ex. Piper, eager to extract herself from this embarrassing situation, hurriedly asks the Dolt, "So, you're going to be okay taking care of everything -- [our soulless sociopath of an infant] and [Big Gay] Chris?" "Absolutely," the Dolt smiles wistfully. "Really, everything will be fine." Piper ignores the rue coloring his tone, bids him goodnight, and flees. The Dolt eases the door shut behind her and mopes. Hey, Dolt! Nobody told you to abandon your family last May. Suck it up, you deadbeat jackhole.