Episode Report Card Demian: A | 210 USERS: B- YOU GRADE IT Big Gay Chris Went To 2026, And All I Got Was This Lousy Headache
By Demian | Season 6 | Episode 10 | Aired on 2003.11.23
Anyway, Big Gay Chris proposes to LesBianca in what he calls "our spot." I'll not be holding this against him, because he of course has yet to meet me in the timeline presented in these scenes. LesBianca agrees to marry him on one condition -- that Big Chris returns safely from the past. They mack, only to be interrupted by a chittering, airborne video camera. No, seriously. It's this minicam with, like, wings or something, and it shoots out an array of lights that flicker across LesBianca's face. Big Gay Chris tosses a hand around, telekinetically smashing the thing against a shattered statue on the far side of the garden. "Are you okay?" he asks. "Yeah," she replies. "I don't think it had time to transmit." "I can't believe he's sending probes after us now," Big Chris snits, rising to his feet. "I'm gonna kill that son of a bitch." He's so cute when he's trying to be butch. "No!" LesBianca cries, rising to latch onto his arms. "You need to stick to the plan," she insists. "You have to go back -- it's the only way to stop him. It's the only way to change all of this." She sadly kisses his hand, and he leans in to rub his forehead against hers before the scene cross-fades back to…
…teary Gay Chris in the present. His eyes dart from the ring to his own reflection before he closes them and sobs.
Castle Montanague, the following morning. Slampiece Buttfuck totes a breakfast tray with a rather prominent glass of champagne -- like, way to support the girlfriend with the self-professed alcohol issue, you wonkily-eyebrowed dipshit -- into the master bedroom, and gently places the whole thing next to a delighted Raige, who's reclining on the canopied bed. They get schmoopy and mack before Raige pulls away to warn, "You better be careful, 'cause a girl could get used to this." "That's the plan," Buttfuck smirks. Raige demurely averts her eyes and giggles. "Did you tell your sisters you're moving out?" he asks. Raige hems and haws and eventually admits she hasn't, claiming that "things have been a little funky" lately. "There's never a good time," he leads. "You don't understand," she counters. "Piper would probably blow a major gasket, and then there are the family obligations, and like it or not, we're stronger together." "You gotta do something for you," Buttfuck argues. Raige blinks. Then, her cell phone rings. "It's the house," she sighs, glancing at the caller ID before answering.