Episode Report Card Erin: F | 1 USERS: C- YOU GRADE IT Did I mention the ass?
By Erin | Season 3 | Episode 13 | Aired on 02.14.2004
This scene is so goddamn stupid that I'm not even going to grace it with a recap. I'm just not. Don't like it? Bite me. Yeah, it's funny, in its own weird way, but it's not even remotely necessary to the plot and it just winds up taking away from what suspense there is in the stuff going on at the Swiss Chalet. Speaking of that, Syd and Vaughn are at Zone Two, and they're about to go down the Horrible Electrified Chute Of Chaos. Syd takes a reading, and the voltage is too high for their neoprene suits to handle. Marshall recommends that they abort. They recommend that they tie a rope to a pipe and slide down the center of the chute, avoiding the 500-volt walls at all costs. They make it down, with Syd accidentally brushing against one wall and not scaring a single person out there in Reality Land.
Syd and Vaughn have about 1:45 left on the clock. They go to Zone Three and shoot some sealant onto each acid showerhead. Well, that was easy. Syd and Vaughn run under the now-covered showerheads. There's more hijinks in the Baby Arena. Weiss marries them. Carrie goes to the hospital. Yeah, it's funnier than that, but it DOESN'T BELONG HERE, SO I'M NOT RECAPPING IT. Back at the chalet, Syd and Vaughn make it to the wine cellar, but they only have a minute left before the alarm system goes back online. Once inside the wine cellar, Vaughn hilariously says, "Look for the '53 Chateau Margot." Yeah. Because they're all MARKED. I know I mark MY wine bottles clearly. Or I would, if any one of them lasted longer than a week in my house.
Syd finds it. Marshall tells them they have twenty seconds. Syd's about to report in when, just then, a door opens elsewhere and a butler walks in. See, it actually WAS easy to get into the wine cellar! You just had to be a butler! Vaughn should have sucked it up and gone into service for a day or so; then that whole LRSTOL wouldn't have mattered! But it matters now, and instead of just bashing the butler on the head with a bottle and getting the hell out of there, Syd and Vaughn just sort of sit there, watching him, and they take so damn long that the alarm finally just...goes off. That's it. They have twenty seconds, they watch the butler like he's a damn Fellini film, and then the alarm goes off. It's just...so...STUPID.
Syd and Vaughn FINALLY run off just as some guards enter and shoot at them. They run to the acid hall and notice that the showerheads are leaking. They quickly make it through by running along the side. The guards show up just then and the showerheads conveniently bust wide open, dousing them in acid. Marshall tells Syd that the security teams have been alerted to their position. And then...Syd and Vaughn just calmly exit the tunnel. Outside. Into the forest. There's no chute of electricity. No hall of empty guns. They're in the acid hall, and then they're...outside. Man. If it was that easy to get in and out of the damn place, why'd we need Vivica? Hell, why'd we need this whole episode? WHY?