Episode Report Card Erin: A | 1 USERS: A+ YOU GRADE IT The Long Kiss Goodnight
By Erin | Season 2 | Episode 13 | Aired on 01.25.2003
Unfortunately, when the window goes, so does the cabin pressure. The door flies off, pulling Useless Henchman with it. He flings into one of the jet engines, and his entry causes it to explode in flames. Back in the cabin, chaos ensues as everything starts flying out of the plane. Syd hangs on to anything she can. Fat Guy doesn't, and therefore wings out the plane to his death. From the outer shot of the plane, it looks like we're going down, we're going down, we're going down, down, down.
Inside, it's not much better. Shit's flying around like there's a large wind machine at the back of the set, and I fully expect John Lithgow to make an appearance and scream at the scary goblin on the wing. Syd manages to make her way to the closet full of Agent Jones's parachutes as Agent Sean and Vaughn watch in desperate anticipation. Through many jagged camera shots, we watch Syd not only put on the parachute, but also don a pair of handy parachute goggles. That Contrivance! She always plans ahead!
Syd pulls her body into a ball and manages to make it from the closet to the door of the plane and out the door past the jet engine unscathed. "What?" says Contrivance. "It was one of those straight-line-to-the-door-even-though-it-looked-like-it-wasn't planes. Kill me." Syd shoots past the engine as Vaughn watches and says, "Oh my god!" Syd, of course, is fine, and pulls her chute just to prove it. Agent Sean and Vaughn both pull off their headsets and stare at the monitor. "Whuuff," says Agent Sean, looking in dismay at the monitor. "She's all yours."
Hee.
Hell-Lay. We enter the scene with a voice-over from Foolio saying that Syd's going to be late. Again. Then we're in the Ovary Kitchen with Will as he pulls a live lobster out of an iced Igloo. Will's all, yeah, she's gonna miss the dirty work. Namely, sticking a couple of live lobsters into a pot of boiling water. Ew. And lest you think I have a problem with lobster, I'd just like to say that I dig it the most. Dropping a living one into a pot of boiling water and listening to it scream is sort of not my thing, but if it's served up on a plate with a vat of steaming butter, I'm all for it.
Foolio seems to hate the process of killing live lobsters for eating, even though, you know, SHE RUNS A RESTAURANT. Will's all, so, the suspense is killing me. What's the occasion? Foolio informs Will that the Plot Device Diner is actually making a profit. Will's all, after six months? Is that even POSSIBLE? Those of us out there who have seen numerous restaurants in our collective neighborhoods come and go after less than six months all answer, "FUCK NO!" But this is Alias, so we'll cut it some slack in the reality department. Francie's all, yeah, it's making a profit -- hence the lobster dinner. "Seriously, if anyone would have told me last year that I would be making this work...my own restaurant...it's just...it's just unbelievable." Yes, it is, Foolio. Then Will steps up and sheepishly says, "I guess this is a really bad time to tell you I have to quit, right? I got a job working for a travel magazine. I mean, it's not The New York Times, but I am writing for a living."
Foolio looks so completely happy when she says, "Will, that is...GENIUS!" And she smiles one of her brilliant smiles. They go back and forth about whether it's genius and how Foolio won't have a problem finding another waiter in Los Angeles and they both congratulate each other and then she launches herself at him and puts her hands on his face and kisses him. Then she pulls back, her hands still on his face, which, if we're all being honest here, is girl language for "Kiss me more, you FOOL!" And Will is certainly no fool. And he kisses her some more. And some more. And oh...
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