Episode Report Card Erin: A | 1 USERS: A+ YOU GRADE IT The Long Kiss Goodnight
By Erin | Season 2 | Episode 13 | Aired on 01.25.2003
Back at Ess Dee Sex, Dix makes a call to his wife. They start out with the typical "what's up?" niceties, but Dix has a purpose with this call. "I was just calling...you..." he sighs heavily, emotion breaking his voice. "To tell you I love you. How much I love you." "Oh, thanks, sweetie," says Mrs. Dix. "I love you too. When will you be home?" Dix is all, uh, not sure. See, like, not only may I not have a job here in a few minutes, but I also my not have any of my limbs. So, like, we'll see. Mrs. Dix is all, okay, well, be safe! And remember to pick up some milk on the way home! Dix is all, I sure will, baby. Later!
He hangs up and stares at his computer screen. There's an email drafted to Syd with the code. He stares at it some more. At Oops Center, the kids have just started a game of cat's cradle when Syd's email dings. She opens up Dix's email and sees that the code is a match. Everyone scatters.
Seconds later, in the Oops Center's very own version of The Conference Room Of Endless Expositions, Kendall's addressing the troops. "Ladies and gentlemen, courtesy of Agent Contrivance Jones here, we managed to get our hands on a single teensy bit of information that, conveniently, will allow us to completely destroy the Alliance in a matter of minutes. I know you're all thinking, 'But wait! We've been trying to destroy the Alliance for years and years and YEARS! We can't possibly be able to just knock it down in minutes because Syd and her lingerie gathered the lamest intel known to man!' Well, people, I'm here to tell you: We can. And we will. Tomorrow morning, God willing, not only will the Alliance no longer exist, but we will have eliminated all possible impediments to the long overdue nookie that Syd and Vaughn have been fantasizing about since they first met. About fucking time, too."
As soon as all the agents change into their stylish-yet-comfortable SWAT uniforms, Kendall delivers yet another annoyingly long expository brief. Blah blah blah, surrounding the Credit Dauphine building, bling blam blooey, something about raiding all the SD offices all over the world at exactly the same time, flip flap floppy, most of the agents are desk-trained and will just stare at you like nervous rabbits but the security guys are gonna have to be gunned down like the dirty animals that they are. Now get out there and get me some dead Alliance agents!
We cut quickly to the underground parking garage at Ess Dee Sex. A bunch of sleek and sexy black SUVs squeal into the garage and stop. Vaughn jumps out of one of them and runs over to a security camera, cutting the cord. Yeah. Because there's only ONE security camera in the entire garage. "Actually," says Agent Contrivance Jones over the comlink, "there is only one camera. Much easier that way. What, you want Vaughn to run around to eighty different cameras? Oh, well, I actually would kind of enjoying watching Vaughn run around to eighty different cameras. Mmmm. Vaughn running. Humminah humminah humminah!"
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