Episode Report Card Jacob Clifton: C- | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT Right Now I'm A Race Car
By Jacob Clifton | Season 1 | Episode 4 | Aired on 04.08.1999
"I can't wait for him," gruffs Aeryn, and tells Pilot to get her Prowler ready. Pilot doesn't even ask. Aeryn tells John to head out with her: "We don't get that crystal back, we're gonna crash into the planet. I've gotta plan." I love how even the show can't justify saving Rygel, because he's such a piece of shit, so it's like "...but without him they'll all die this week, so we have to go get him." John starts stuttering because he knows a little something about Aeryn and her plans: "Jam down to the planet. Conduct a commando-style raid against what, a couple of dozen heavily armed Tavloids, and then haul ass back up to the ship." She corrects him ("Tav-leks") and takes off. He starts screaming that Wile E. Coyote could come up with a better plan, and -- not for nothing, but that's (a) the only plan she ever comes up with, and (b) the only plan that ever works -- asks how the hell she's going to pull this off herself. "No, of course not! You're coming with me," she says easily. He tells her to shove that egg back on up the chicken, but she storms back: "This is my turn. My plan. Now let's go." He tries desperately to come up with alternate plans, scrapes the barrel a bit -- "Try negotiating with the Tavloids?" -- and she full-on just walks up and punches him. "Tav-leks." It's one of those things, like I said, that comes back around to be funny again, which are few and depend on mostly acting chops. Two things here: one being that, again, in this episode you catch more flies with hitting than with talking, because we're in D'Argo/Aeryn world; and the other being that it's still about running, for Aeryn. Even now, she needs Moya moving, and that's the only reason she wants Rygel back, or D'Argo awake, or John around: so she can keep running.
Commercial. Aeryn's Prowler heads for Tavloidia, John passed out in the back. Aeryn is wearing crazy sexy netting stuff, for under the Tavlek armor, and looks like the hottest thing in all the Matrix. Zhaan tells her that Moya can't seem to scan for the shuttle the bad guys took back to the planet, because there are too many "chlorophoric compounds in the vegetation." I think that "chlorophoric compounds" means "shitty spray-paint," which is something that the flora on Tavlekistan are just covered in. Pilot's saying they can get a better fix once they reconfigure Moya's sensors, but Aeryn's all about the moving forward: "I'm following the same trajectory their shuttle did." John jolts awake, still yakking about negotiations, and then notices he's in the Prowler. She raises one adorable, innocent eyebrow. "You hit me!" he whines, and she just grins to herself. "No, no, a Pentak jab! You're more susceptible than most." He tells her to make sure he doesn't wake up next time, the most adorable nonsense threat ever, and she just chuckles to herself and shakes her head. "Oh, don't 'tsk' me! This is not over with! And when it is, you and I are gonna sit down and have a serious talk!" She tells him that sounds great, but probably they're both going to die in a few minutes, and banks hard to the right, like a total bad-ass.
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