Episode Report Card Jacob Clifton: A+ | 5 USERS: A+ YOU GRADE IT Don't You Wish You Never Met Her?
By Jacob Clifton | Season 4 | Episode 4 | Aired on 07.02.2013
Emily: "Well, whatever. Paige just showed up lookin' stellar. Peace."
Spencer: "Are you ready for this? Are you ready to get Melissa? By showing her a mask?"
Aria: "Yes but can we do it tomorrow? I don't really have time to save our own lives and the lives of the people we love most in the world tonight."
Spencer: "I think you deserve to go on a date with Karate Jake. Frankly, you could devote more time and energy to that relationship. It makes you bearable."
Aria: "I know, right? I'm thinking either I will drive it into the ground like a prop plane flown by a teenager wearing a mask of her own face over her face, or I will grow and change by dating someone who wasn't basically created by a sea witch to be my perfect mate."
OUTSIDE
Paige awesomely sympathizes about the rotator cuff conversation in the perfect Emily way: By pointing out that Emily's failure is her success. I really do appreciate what they've done this season. It's not like some teen show where you just ignore the fact that your girlfriend tried to kill you in the pool, you just turn it into something to be sexy about. It's more like real life that way. (I mean, I'm guessing. When I drown my competition, they fuckin' stay down. Chaos is a ladder and the climb is all there is.)
Emily: "If I never swim again because then I'll die, how can we live in your purple lesbian matrix simulacrum?"
Paige: "Wait, what?"
Emily: "Nothing, just give me a hug. But don't touch my shoulder."
KARATE DATE
Aria looks amazing! Her mustards are receiving sufficient accolades, if you know what I mean. Sweet hipster side-pony, nothing too much of a muchness, fun party shirt like a Chrysler Building, a nice red lip. Hanna's got some looks this episode, but I think Aria wins overall.
Jake: "One thing I love about Jackie Chan is, he shows you how hard it is."
Aria: "That's what she said."
Malcolm: "Mommy Aria! Please don't throw me on the ground or let your friends abduct me!"
Aria: "Oh hey, little boy that I don't know. Are you here alone? Do you come here often to this bookstore by yourself?"
Malcolm: "No, because I'm five! My real parents are in the bookstore, like you could have assumed."
Jake: "Are you buyin' books? What kinda books?"
Malcolm: "Don't talk to hot condescending strangers kind of books, sir."