Episode Report Card Demian: D+ | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT Shannen sings!
By Demian | Season 3 | Episode 24 | Aired on 01.19.1997
Elsewhere, Simon and Slammin’ Sammy approach Kinda Cute Nick to apologize for their earlier boorish behavior. Shannen comes upon the scene, and perches on a stool close to the Nickster. Chloë approaches from the opposite direction in time to hear the Male Ss ask Nick and Shannen to rejoin the band after the competition. Before either can respond, the band wrangler calls Simon, Sammy, and Chloë to the stage. Chloë looks like she’s about to cry, but throws herself instead into Psycho Slut Denial Mode. She clutches at Simon’s bony arm, insisting that whatever Shannen told him "was a lie." Shannen and Kinda Cute Nick glance at her, glance at each other, smirk, and look away. Dud Punk takes to the stage. They’re bad. Don’t ask for a longer description, because I just can’t come up with anything new. They just plain suck, okay? The lyrics, the music, the instrumentation, the vocals, the clothing, the lighting, the choreography. All of it’s bad. Chloë’s fine -- relatively speaking, of course -- until she hits the bridge of the song. Then she spots Mommie Harding in the audience, and starts her final spiral back down into the snake pit. She hallucinates other people from her past amid the throng below the stage, among them Little Nancy Kerrigan; Brad Strum, Dork Stalker; and Gina Gershon-Armstrong. From the intercut psychotic Chloë POVs that pop up between shots of Chloë blowing it up onstage, we see that from her perspective, the audience has vanished save for those mentioned above. She has more of the blue-wash flashbacks to the SoCal Youth Talent Show Of Doom and starts to croon "Beautiful Dreamer" over whatever crap it is that Simon and Sammy are trying to play. There’s a very brief fast-forward sequence of Chloë screwing Simon, then she backs away from the microphone, clawing away at the cockroaches on her face. Or something appropriately hallucinatory like that. She runs into the wings to the roaring jeers of the audience. Simon and Sammy beckon Shannen and Kinda Cute Nick to the stage. Nick clues the others in on the chord progression of the song he and Shannen planned to perform. Chloë, meanwhile, has fallen into the arms of Mommie Harding. As Shannen triumphs yet again, Chloë slips into catatonia, murmuring, "Hold me, Mommy," over and over again. Yes, Chloë. Exactly. I wasn’t going to transcribe the lyrics for the final song, but they’re too bad to pass up:Well I can't blame the rain for all of my pain,Previous 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25Next