Episode Report Card Sara M: A+ | 1 USERS: A+ YOU GRADE IT The Dorky Decimal System
By Sara M | Season 11 | Episode 9 | Aired on 12.04.2004
Noah staggers around a little and comes across a sword stuck in a stone. "This cannot be Excalibur!" he says. Bob tells him to go ahead and try to remove the sword from the stone. Noah says he doesn't think he's quite worthy of it, and asks how exactly he was chosen for this job, although he doesn't seem to care what exactly his job entails, or why there are screaming baby faces hidden in boxes under his purview. Standing in front of what I believe is a goldified King Midas, Bob explains their process for choosing candidates for The Librarian job. Noah decides he'd rather juggle the golden eggs laid by a nearby goose than pay attention to Bob, and then says that he can't wait to tell his mother about his new job. At that point, Ominous Music plays and Excalibur unsheathes itself from the stone and hovers in front of Noah's neck. Bob informs Noah that The Library is a thousands-of-years-old secret that only The Librarians know, and since Noah's mom is not The Librarian, she will be kept in the dark. Bob calls off Excalibur, and apparently he calls off my TiVo as well, because it pauses for a few seconds.
When it decides to work again, Noah is grabbing books off of shelves until he comes upon a jetpack. Ah, one of our Earth's treasures indeed: a prop from Lost in Space. Noah sits in front of it and presses the "go" button. We cut to Bob, ambling along with a book. He looks up to see a riderless jetpack go flying past him, followed by Noah, telling no one to worry. Bob looks at his watch as we hear Noah and the jetpack struggling off-screen. I love how bored Bob is by this movie.
At the end of the day, Bob escorts Noah out. He tells Noah that he could be a truly great Librarian, and shows him a wall of dignified, yet still cheap-looking portraits of former Librarians. Last in the row is a picture of the last Librarian, one "Edward Wilde," who looks a lot like Kyle MacLachlan. Bob says that Noah is taking Wilde's place, and that Wilde died.
Night has fallen on The Library, and Bob is still at work. The man is tireless in his Library devotion! He's alone, which is why he's suspicious when he hears a glass breaking. He gets up to investigate as the soundtrack plays mood-settingly. He comes across two fallen guards, but doesn't have time to do anything before someone comes up behind him and thwacks him across the back of the head with a very fake sound effect. "Ugh," Bob says on his way to the floor. Would it have been really awesome if he had said "uh [coughs, clears throat] ugh"? Yes. Yes it would have been.
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