Episode Report Card Demian: F | 1 USERS: A+ YOU GRADE IT Jesus Is Just Alright With Me
By Demian | Season 7 | Episode 20 | Aired on 05.07.2005
Up in the Prue Halliwell Memorial Bimbo Boudoir Of Paisley Tit Slings And Other Fashion Atrocities, currently occupied by the kids, the Dolt places the Psycho in the latter's roomy little crib-like bed and, allowing fatherly concern to crease his forehead, asks the terror if he's okay. The Psycho just stares blankly at the Dolt. Evil! Meanwhile, poor little brain-damaged Tiny Gay Chris quite happily drools all over himself in the blurry background of the shot. Heh. The Dolt rises to tend to his younger, eventually far prettier son, and as the camera arcs around the Psycho, we see that Vicus has silently joined the party. The Psycho greets his demonic friend with audibly vicious delight. Vicus slithers something about the detested Crusty Ted as the Dolt, still oblivious to Vicus's presence and affect on his elder son, frets wordlessly. Shut up, Dolt.
"Shoot," Piper grunts down on the sun porch, where she's busy scribbling out a spell on the pad of paper she'd retrieved from the sideboard. "What rhymes with 'communicate'?" she wonders, and you're asking this of the nitwit who can't define "flogging," Piper? Get a grip. Raige dodges the question by mentioning the whole personal-gain thing that they only seem to remember when it's convenient for the purposes of the current storyline. "[The Psycho] created a demon who kidnapped him and a dragon that nearly destroyed the city," Piper snorts. "I'm not real worried about personal gain." Besides, as Piper explains, they'll be casting the spell on themselves, anyway, and...not so much with that last bit at all, Piper, but you'll be finding that out for yourself in about five seconds. Piper makes a couple of adjustments to the spell, then reads it aloud:
Help this mother understand
The thoughts inside her little man:
Even though his mouth be [nigh close]
Let us hear his inner [Psycho].
Oh, shut up. Do you know how hard it is to come up with a rhyme for "Psycho" when you're facing a deadline? Anyway, a swirling cloud of glowing golf balls immediately erupts on the sun porch. Piper and Raige eye the phenomenon warily as it gradually coagulates and congeals into Mangy Jesus form. Only he's not so mangy this time around, unfortunately. No, he's clean-shaven and short-haired and sporting faded blue jeans and a tan jacket and he's just really, really...bland-looking. Boring Jesus lets his eyes wander around the room for a moment while Raige shudders with surprise and Piper gazes at the strange young man on the sun porch with something approaching horrified shock. Heh. Boring Jesus eventually settles his attention on Piper, and cocks his head all, "Mom?" Piper's jaw hits the floor. "It's me," Boring Jesus continues, a faint smile flickering across his face, "[Boring Jesus]!" Raige gapes as Piper disbelievingly whips her head around straight into the commercial break.