Episode Report Card Heathen: B- | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT Escape From L.A.
By Heathen | Season 3 | Episode 6 | Aired on 12.01.2003
Potato Face is sitting at her desk doing fugly things with her lips when Special Agent Charlie Brown calls asking for a radar tracking of the KieferKopter. Potato sends him the information as Spawn watches from across the room, unsure when to register a facial expression. "He's heading west toward downtown," Potato Face monotones. Charlie deduces that Kief's kunning plan is to get the kopter over a populated area so that it can't be shot down. Charlie lets a bead of sweat squeak out of one of his pores so that we know all these attempts to outthink Kiefer are strenuous. Charlie asks Potato Face to hijack an emergency frequency so that he can get a message to Kiefer via the radio. "On it," Potato Face says.
Some guy named Major Blanchard is talking to Ryan Chappelle, our rat-faced enemy from Day 2 who likes to sweep in and take control right when it's most dire for Kiefer. It's like he's got KiefKrisis radar stitched into his clip-on tie. Major Blowhard intones that they have ten minutes before they catch Kiefer. Chappelle weasels that they should shoot down the helicopter if necessary, but before it gets over the city, at which point it would risk dropping fatal debris or its flaming carcass upon civilians and reviled doctors alike. Spawn and Bitchelle both eavesdrop as Chappelle hangs up and smarms to Bitchelle that he's taking over while Soul Patch is in the hospital. She frowns, then vomits out some more exposition so that we're absolutely clear where things stand: They need to reach the chopper to tell Kiefer that they've got Kontagious Kyle in custody, because once he knows that, he'll dump Hartmano like the prison bitch he is. Chappelle calls a meeting to make sure everyone's on the same page, pushing the envelope outside the box, and other clichés for the power-hungry executive. As he walks away, Bitchelle frowns a bit more so that we're clear she isn't wild about Chappelle being brought into the situation so that, like always, he can make inconvenient decisions that thwart the good guys. She's a little sick of the sameness of it. She's not wrong.
Potato Face, who can't do anything with ease or speed, is still trying to hook onto an emergency frequency so Special Agent Charlie Brown can talk to the KieferKopter. Bitchelle orders Adam The Woman Hater to round up the appropriate people and hit the conference room. She then gives Spawn an assignment I don't understand that will allegedly help Potato Face. "I'm on it," Spawn says. Is that the only thing anyone on this show says when they get orders? So far it's been done twice. Whatever happened to "Sure," "Aye aye," or "Fuck yeah, bitch, I'm'a rip up that shit with a quickness"? All equally effective.