Episode Report Card Demian: C+ | 186 USERS: C+ YOU GRADE IT Welcome To Fantathy Thithtern!
By Demian | Season 6 | Episode 6 | Aired on 2003.10.26
Over in Raige's fantasyland, several bleeping machines monitor the elderly magician's condition in a curtained corner of the emergency room while, in the background, a disembodied voice pages "Dr. Kurtz to Demonology." Kathryn Joosten worriedly hovers over the unconscious gent as Raige eases through the curtains to enter the room. Kathryn offers her heartfelt thanks to Raige for saving her husband's life. Raige begs off, noting that the hospital's medical staff is responsible for Charley's continued well-being. "I was just his cosmic taxi," she insists. Kathryn waves away this display of modesty and continues to lavish praise on the increasingly befuddled Raige. Raige once again wonders how Kathryn knew of Raige's bitchcraft. Kathryn doesn't directly answer the question as asked. Instead, she gets a bit feisty and asserts, "This ain't Salem, honey. There's no shame in being a witch today -- you should use your magic with pride!" Raige bugs out her eyes in disbelief as we…
…slam back to the Manor for a face-full of ass. No, seriously. One of the man-pantied GAY MALE STRIPPERS is wriggling his scantily clad rear end directly into the camera as Piper's dozen or so guests whoop and holler. Piper, by contrast, is mortified, likely because this GAY MALE STRIPPER sucks. What's that you said? Well, of course he sucks that way, but I'm talking about his utter lack of rhythm. You'd think with all the nipple ponies prancing around West Hollywood, the casting director would have found at least one who could dance. And you'd be wrong, as the next GAY MALE STRIPPER proves when he bounces gracelessly into the parlor to gyrate before the screeching clumps of estrogen arrayed on chairs around the room. Whatever. This scene represents an embarrassment for everyone involved -- and when you're talking about Charmed, that's saying a lot -- so let's cut to the chase: Piper hears Tiny Gay Chris wailing through the baby monitor, and excuses herself to check on him. Once she reaches The Patricia Campbell Hearst Commemorative Child-Care Nook, she realizes Tiny Chris is "burning up," and shoves one of those baby thermometers in his ear. When it beeps, she removes it to discover that he's working a hundred-and-two fever. "[Dolt]?" Piper cries, looking up. "Come on, [Tiny Chris] needs you!" There's no answer.