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Episode Report Card Erin: A | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT Darkness Falls

By Erin | Season 2 | Episode 17 | Aired on 03.01.2003

Lewis kind of smiles snidely at her and then asks if Syd and Vaughn are knockin' da boots on a regular basis. Syd's all, blow me, fuckmuffin. That's none of your goddamn business. Lewis is all, yeah, kind of an awkward question, isn't it? I have to say, Richard Lewis is really awesome here. He's sort of got a Danger Nerd aspect to him. Like he's sort of dorky and lacking in social graces, but you totally know he could pull out some nunchakus and go martial on your arts.

Syd demands that she be given an idea as to what in the hell is going on and who the hell is he? Lewis kindly and tersely informs her that he's a counter-intelligence threat analyst, and that it's basically his job to find out just why in the hell Vaughn's been contacting a bunch of unapproved foreign operatives and also pursued contact with this Vladimir dude, who also just happens to be a former KGB assassin with known ties to at least three terrorist organizations. Syd gets all uppity with Lewis, spewing something about how this is impossible! Lewis just cuts her off and tells her that Vaughn has no idea he's being investigated, and if Syd takes it upon herself to inform Vaughn of this fact, her ass will be tossed in jail while also adding her name to the list of suspects. So, just for the record, will you be engaging in any pillow talk later this evening with your non-boyfriend or WHAT? Syd doesn't answer, instead choosing to stare at him in an attempt to make sense of why Marty Gold is badgering her into talking about nookie.

Yeah. I'm going to need a whole lot of grain alcohol to get through this episode. Owen! Honey! Mix me up a batch of cayenne pepper and Everclear martinis, okay? It's going to be a long night.

When we return from the first of far too many commercial breaks, Alfalfa's trying to convince Spanky to let Irina out for some CIA-sanctioned fun in the sun at the old Bang and Cock. Spanky Von Vitriol isn't having any of it. Jack presses the issue, stating that, if Irina hadn't been along during the Kashmir jaunt, it would have wound up being a complete and utter embarrassment. Wait. Which part of that assignment WASN'T an embarrassment? The screw-up with the truck? The weapons mishap? The all-chambers-firing showdown set to U2's "Walk On"? Are you saying that was all GOOD? Dude. Eat some more 'shrooms and go play hide the peanut with Irina's navel. You're all done here.

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