Episode Report Card Jacob Clifton: A+ | 38 USERS: A YOU GRADE IT Your Body Will Know
By Jacob Clifton | Season 4 | Episode 14 | Aired on 01.07.2014
Aria: "Perfect. Hit the gas."THE BREW
Emily assumes that she is going to be murdered by whoever is out there, so she grabs a carafe of boiling coffee water and prepares to clobber the person... But then it's just Claire, of the Courtland Liars, who feels like she needs to talk about some things.
Emily: "...Want some tea? That's why I have this pot of boiling water in attack position. It is in case of friendship!"
CABIN OF DOOM
Ezra: "I have this ... friend. Who owns this ... murder cabin. So I come here when he's ... out of the country. To ... write. Where the internet and phone cannot find me. Or help."
Aria: "Just like we always talked about! Totally secluded, with plenty of blunt objects and things to choke me to death with."
Ezra: "I just wish I could go back to before Noel Kahn figured out we were dating. It's been downhill from there."
Aria: "Don't you mean, before you statutory made out with me in a bar?"
Ezra: "No, that part was awesome."
Aria: "I know I came here so you would exactly say these things, but let me apply the brakes. You know that we are under constant surveillance so you won't get fired by the Vice Principal..."
Ezra: "I love how you say that like it's your problem."
Aria: "And I am dating this gorgeous, sweet karate guy as a beard..."
Ezra: "Again, not really selling how you lose here."
Aria: "Lose? What are you talking about? This creepy pining you're doing where you address every lecture to me and pick me up in strange costumes is like, literally the only way my life could get better. And it is!"
She says a very true thing about how sometimes it's hard to remember what's real, and what used to be true or might be true in the future: How you wake up and just lie there for a second, untangling what's real from what's true on the inside. If you do this with reality facts, you are crazy; if you do this with your heart, you are the kind of crazy called love, which is acceptable because it's not going anywhere.
Ezra kisses her, or rather they kiss each other, and he gives her a key to the cabin, and says the creepiest words of all time, the most perfect thing of this perfect show: "It could be our secret." To the only person on Earth probably whose skin wouldn't turn itself inside-out just from hearing those words from her English teacher. Making him A was the smartest thing this show ever did, dude. It takes the unacceptableness of their relationship and doubles down on the badness, thereby rendering the entire thing... acceptable? Yeah. I'm down.