Episode Report Card M. Giant: B+ | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT Unhappy Campers
By M. Giant | Season 4 | Episode 17 | Aired on 04.10.2005
Speaking of cell phones, the Campers are running through the desert when their cell phone rings. Good thing they can still get a signal. They stop to answer it. Kiefer tells him they found an unmanned reserve power station "about a half a mile north of you." Camper Guy remembers it from the map. A half mile away? They're out in the middle of nowhere. He should remember it from daylight. Kiefer tells them to get there, break in, and hide. He also wants them to not use their flashlights, and to take the batteries out of their cell phone. He's already onto ImhoTerror's scanning strategy, you see. He says Camper Guy can put the batteries back in if he needs to contact Kiefer, but only in emergencies, and gives Camper Guy his direct line. Which, oddly enough, is the same phone number that TerrorTeen's girlfriend's mom has. Hmmmm. Kiefer hangs up, and the Campers are off again.
But it's too late, because the terrorist with the GameBoy homed in on the cell phone signal long enough to figure out that they're headed north. Another henchman checks the map and finds the power station. "Whoever has the Football," ImhoTerror says, "that's where they're headed." Uh oh. So much for hiding. It's 11:27:12.
11:31:36. The Veep veeps, Kiefer flies, and the Campers run. They still haven't turned off their flashlights, the idiots. But they've reached the power station, a rather large, dilapidated building surrounded by enough floodlights that it would have been visible from a much longer way off than ImhoTerror's headlights were. They easily break in by smashing a window with a rock. The interior of the building is dimly lit, a cavernous maze of giant pipes, conduits, and catwalks. Add a few steam clouds and welder babes in bikinis and it would be as well suited for an '80s hair-metal music video as it is for a suspenseful game of cat-and-mouse. I hope I'm not giving anything away by saying that. "We're not in any danger, right?" asks Camper Chick once they're inside. "I mean, how could anyone even know that we're here?" Camper Guy makes reassuring noises, then sarcastically comments, "Well, a nice, relaxing weekend in the desert, just like I said." Wait, it's a weekend? Those people at IDS Systems are even more diligent than I thought. Then he peers out the window he just broke to see that the Jeeps are already arriving. Whoopsie. "I gotta call Kiefer," he says.
Even with headphones on and riding in a helicopter, Kiefer hears his cell phone ring. He's all business when Camper Guy tells him the terrorists are there: "How many?" I can tell you right now that although it seems like there should be more, ImhoTerror only brought three guys with him. Because he apparently figured that either the Football would get sucked out of the plane before it crashed, or that four terrorists would be sufficient to take on the army of people who'd be swarming over the actual wreck, looking for the President. I'm pretty sure it's the former. In which case, how is CTU supposed to stop a guy who can predict the future, anyway? This is so unfair. In any case, all Camper Guy knows about ImhoTerror's away team is that they've arrived in two Jeeps. He worriedly wonders when Kiefer's going to get there. Kiefer tells him to stand by and switches over to Soul Patch, who's just uploading the power station schematics to Kiefer's screen. Kiefer switches back to Camper Guy and tells him to go to the "lower level, southeast corner." Camper Guy tells Kiefer, "Please hurry." "We are," Kiefer says.