Episode Report Card Jacob Clifton: A+ | 37 USERS: A+ YOU GRADE IT I Don't Actually Know What You Did Last Labor Day
By Jacob Clifton | Season 4 | Episode 22 | Aired on 03.04.2014
BREW
Hanna: "Oh hey Gabe. Look out in case I accidentally bump into your mouth again."
Gabe: "Haha, that was a great way of de-weirding the situation. Thanks for doing that. You are a class act, Marin."
Hanna: "Do you have any normal, appropriate observations to share with me? Cop-to-child?"
Gabe: "Yeah you know, that boy Travis Hobbs is really into you."
Hanna: "What is the meaning of that? To what end are you telling me this."
Gabe: "I'm just weirdly into your love life. Really, anything that keeps my incredible, beautiful voice coming out of my stunning supermodel face is worthwhile. Also, did you slip me a note about how Alison is still alive?"
Hanna: "Trust me that I did not. The authorities are the last people I would involve."
Gabe: "Not this note here?"
Hanna: "No, but I am banking that handwriting for later. Anyway, bye. Thanks for your interest in my teen dating life. I'm glad we're back to being friends or whatever."
Gabe: "Remember that time I said it always comes down to teeth? That was so fucking weird and awesome when I said that."
HOTEL
Aria: "Are you for real waking me up with guitar and no shirt, just a necklace? I love how no matter what happens my life is always fan fiction."
Riley: "This is my guitar, Antonio."
Aria: "Sure thing. Obviously you named your guitar Antonio."
Riley, verbatim: "I like to think he named himself."
Oh, do you? Do you really, Riley? Well, I like to think that this episode is a very subtle, very mean joke about Aria Montgomery.
Riley: "We cleaned out the minibar, even the pineapple rum. It was like we were nihilists, but never forgot that we also were prospective college freshmen."
Aria: "Put down Antonio and get over here. We have a lot of sex to have."
Riley: "Is there anything hotter than legal sex between two consenting equals?"
Aria: "Oh, Riley. Consent never bothered me anyway."
SCHOOL
Emily: "So this person that told Gabe about Alison being alive, were they a boy or a girl? Was the handwriting psycho like Alison's, or more thug-like?"
Hanna: "Hang on, I have to go deal with Travis. Apparently I needed Gabe to explain to me that he's into me, and since Gabe isn't, I am trying to take it seriously."