Episode Report Card Jacob Clifton: A+ | 118 USERS: A- YOU GRADE IT My Bloody Valentine
By Jacob Clifton | Season 5 | Episode 6 | Aired on 11.03.2013
TATTOO
Tattoo lady wants a baby, or she doesn't want a baby, or she wants to get knocked up and then break up with Will and just have his baby, or she doesn't want those things, or whatever. The point is that Will is disgusting for having any amount of patience with her bullshit whatsoever. What a horrible individual they have devised. It's not even about her being the opposite of Alicia -- which I guess she is? -- but more that she's an embarrassing person. We are the average of the five people we spend the most time with.
LOCKHART/MCVEIGH
Kurt: "Alicia's asked me to testify in your former gun case."
Diane: "Are you saying this to be an asshole to me, or because you want my permission, or..."
Kurt: "Neither. We said when we got married we can't veto each other's cases. This is strictly due diligence, I'm informing you."
Diane: "Ugh. It was my case."
Kurt: "And it's winnable."
Diane: "For Alicia."
Kurt: "For Heather Sorrentino. And for everybody else that won't die from a defecti..."
Diane: "How dare you confront me with my own hypocrisy! That's so mean! Go be a hero, mister hero! Think you're better than me why I'll show you who's blah blah..."
SORRENTINO
Kurt: "...In summation, these guns are bullshit and barely guns in my opinion. Law enforcement calls them 'junk guns.' They're easy to buy, so you see them everywhere. In this case I bought five other ones at five different stores, to ensure they'd be random, and here's what I found. The trigger mechanism had a faulty spring, and the resistance was 75 percent less than normal."
Alicia: "That's a hair trigger, right? So if you dropped it, it would go off."
Kurt: "It would be more surprising if it didn't."
When Nancy stands up to cross, and does her usual bullshit, there's a sort of bittersweet thing where when Alicia looks over to her left, to roll her eyes about it with co-counsel like always, nobody's there: Alicia's all alone.
Nancy: "Um... I don't know much about guns, but um, my Daddy does hunt a little bit, and he told me that there are other factors, like weather, that can contribute to a firearm's performance?"
Kurt: "I guess, sure."
Nancy: "So that June night, when Chicago's heat wave hit 98 degrees?"
Kurt: "Uh."
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