Episode Report Card Demian: B- | 159 USERS: C+ YOU GRADE IT Revenge Of The Big Gay Done One (Part The Second)
By Demian | Season 5 | Episode 23 | Aired on 2003.05.11
Manor parlor. Aphrophoebe lounges on her ridiculous ruby-red goddess couch. Did I neglect to mention her ridiculous ruby-red goddess couch in that previous scene? Sorry. In any event, Bogtrotter appears, and Aphrophoebe plies him with her womanly wiles. Bitch Tits shows up, berates Bogtrotter for lusting after the Aphrofeebs, and the two hurl their Titan mojo at the Fun Bags. Rathena, heaving a tremendously put-upon sigh, walks right through Bogtrotter and Bitch Tits while waving a tired hand around and ordering, "End war game!" You see, Rathena apparently has access to futuristic holographic equipment. Just go with it. The discouraged Glamorous Goddesses slouch over into the sitting room and collapse onto the sofa and armchair. Their nephew orbs in, wondering what gives. The gals, gradually dropping their goddess attitude during the conversation that follows, whine a lot and ask for the Dolt. Big Gay Chris reminds them that the Dolt has more important matters to handle at the moment, and asks again, "What is wrong with you?" "You seem hopeless," he adds. Phoebe and Raige deliver these long-winded speeches about how much they depend upon the Dolt's pep talks before heading off to slay demons, like, whatever, ladies. I've been watching this show for far too long to put up with this truckload of bullshit you're shoveling into my lap during this scene. You want to convince me the Dolt's a vital part of your lives? Then show me. Don't present me with a character so useless and dull-witted and limp that a nasty nickname like "The Dolt" would almost immediately take hold in my mind, and then expect me to switch gears and believe he's this super-fabulous asset now just because you say so, forty minutes before his son blows him the fuck up. Whatever. I hate this show.
This tedious conversation does lead to an amusing moment, though. Big Gay Chris, fed up with their moping, leaps to his feet and demands that they tell him what he needs to do to get them motivated. Phoebe goes all Horshack on Chris's unsuspecting ass, hooting, "Oooh! Oooh!" before offering, "Try saying this: 'Your power comes from your emotions.'" "Or what about this?" Raige interjects, before adding with appropriately Doltish solemnity, "'Trust. The Power of Three.'" Phoebe giggles and snerks, "How about, 'I'm gonna go check with the Elders'? Do you actually thinks he checks with the Elders?" Raige duhs, "No. He probably just orbs to a bar and buys his buddies rounds of drinks." Big Gay Chris just stares at them all, "My family is full of FREAKS." Heh.