Episode Report Card Erin: A+ | 2 USERS: A+ YOU GRADE IT Tell Her About It
By Erin | Season 2 | Episode 22 | Aired on 05.03.2003
Irina goes on to say that she doesn't know where Sloane is, but she's damn sure Sark does. Why? And why would he know and not her? Oh, who gives a shit. Irina tells Syd that the CIA had better get their hands on Sark and fast. She then gives Syd the name of a club in Stockholm where Sark will definitely be, tomorrow night at 10 PM. Syd's all, yeah, um, I think I've fallen for this act about ten too many times, okay? How fucking stupid and gullible do you think I am?
Irina's all, well, ultimately, you'll do whatever you want. "That's what free will's all about," she says, hanging up the phone. Back at Oops Center, Vaughn walks up and flings himself into a chair next to Syd, complaining that he has nothing -- what about her? Syd just stares at her phone, then turns to Vaughn. "We're going to Sweden." Heh.
Sweden. Where Lena Olin's From. Really, people. I got nothing on the titles. Nothing. We're following along behind Syd and Vaughn as they stalk into the Stockholm club. Damn. They both walk weird. Really. I think it has a lot to do with what they're wearing, but they both look like they're on stilts or something. Once again, Syd's sporting a wig and a much cooler outfit than Vaughn. Why is SHE disguised when Vaughn isn't? Sark knows what BOTH of them look like, doesn't he? Just once, I'd like to see Vaughn in a huge 'fro or something, sporting a purple leisure suit and, like, white rattlesnake boots.
"Everyone's blonde in here," says Vaughn, after he and Syd have been seated for a while. "I keep thinking I see him." "Sark's not here," says Syd, sipping on her bright red cocktail. "As expected." Syd then wants to know about how they go on vacation when all this is over. Um, Syd? Your dad might be dead, okay? Fuck your vacation. Hello? Inappropriate, anyone? They continue blathering about the vacation, and really, I think it's sweet and all, but JACK'S AT THE MERCY OF A BARGAIN BASEMENT BUDDHIST. Let's try to put shit in perspective, okay?
Suddenly, Vaughn spies Sark, dressed down in a luscious pair of jeans and a shirt. Syd and Vaughn move over, and whip out their guns, right in public. Vaughn slams Sark's head onto the table and says, "See? When I have a gun to your head, I don't just pull the trigger." Hee. "Thank you," snits Sark. Hee again! Vaughn slams Sark's head back down on the table. "You're welcome," he says. Tee hee! It's all sorts of funny over here.
Syd demands to know where her father is. Sark quickly gives up that Sloane and Jack are in Mexico City. Wow. That was...awfully wussy of him. Also, Mexico City? Would that be the same Mexico City where a bunch of innocent parishioners were burned to an unholy crisp inside a church? Hmmm...the plot, she doth have the consistency of blancmange.
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