Episode Report Card Jacob Clifton: A+ | 34 USERS: A- YOU GRADE IT What We Pretend To Be
By Jacob Clifton | Season 4 | Episode 11 | Aired on 08.20.2013
Emily: "No. Do you know, in turn, who ran over my house with that car?"Tanner: "Sike, I am not actually here to talk about that but to put the screws to Hanna. Guess what we found in the wreckage? A shoe! A muddy one, as in the prophecy."
Hanna: "I gotta bounce."
Tanner: "We have ways of testing these things out. It's called 'ballistics.'"
Hanna bails to barf -- which I don't love; it's getting past weird how often we talk about Hanna and food this season; if there's a reason, a possibility I'm willing to admit, I don't understand it -- and Tanner basically laughs like the Sea Witch, and it's amazing! She got so Roma Maffia on you and you didn't even see it coming!
Spencer: "Okay, here's my theory. I think this isn't really about the shoe, it's just about making sure Mona's testimony gets kicked out again. That was the only thing that interrupted A's big plan to screw your mom over was Mona suddenly jumping on Hanna's behalf."
Aria: "I think she's fishing to see if we forced Mona to do it, or maybe Spencer's mom..."
Emily: "Let's not forget that video of the person wearing my face. That seems like it probably would keep Tanner's interest piqued, right?"
Spencer: "What we need to do is put CeCe on Tanner's radar. Or frankly, vice versa would also work. If you know what I am saying."
Aria: "So let's just tell her there's baked ziti in the crawlspace."
Spencer: "No, let's just investigate the crawlspace more, so we can prove CeCe has been living there since she moved out from that apartment with the angry awesome girl, like Emily has failed to do this entire time she's been living there."
CeCe Drake actually living in a crawlspace, possibly in a red riding hood, possibly with a mask -- or multiple masks -- on her face. Just eatin' Cheetos and drawing up her lunatic plans that don't make any sense whatsoever and practicing for her pilot's license and staring up at Emily's crotch. I mean just picture it.
Emily: "Mrs. D basically just drinks all day directly over that crawlspace."
Spencer: "So Hanna can take her drunk shopping. She loves that shit."
Hanna: "Yes, trying on clothing with the most body-shaming person any of us have ever met is definitely the healthiest next step for me, after I just barfed."
Spencer: "Okay, we've said the word crawlspace about a hundred times, I'm bored of that word. Now, everybody say the word hoedown over and over."
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