Episode Report Card Demian: B | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT Blinded by the Dolt
By Demian | Season 3 | Episode 11 | Aired on 01.24.2001
Natalie says she knows what Beavis looks like, and offers to help Prue. Prue allows her to tag along, informing her that the BoS is in the attic. "Attic?" Natalie asks. "You mean the Altar Room, don't you?" Natalie goes on about the rules dictating the placement of the BoS in some sort of "sacred and protected spot." Prue and Piper have a round of eye-rolling. The Dolt suggests that Prue bring the BoS downstairs to the dining room. Prue snidely remarks that she'll "just run up to the Altar Room, which by the way is right next to the Potions Lab," and she'll be back with the BoS. Piper primly keeps her mouth shut during all of this, but her expression tells us she'd rather be cleaning a bus-station toilet with her tongue than deal with Natalie and her many tedious rules. The Dolt sighs and picks up a strawberry. Natalie clicks a warning to him, and the Dolt drops the berry back on the plate. "I'm not supposed to eat on the job," he tells Piper, who again raises her eyebrows and rolls her eyes.
Exterior shot of a diner called the Rose Café. Inside, Phoebe sits in a booth with Reese, who asks her if she's certain she doesn't want to order anything to eat. She eyes his coffee cup and changes her mind, asking for a bagel. Reese turns his head to relate her order to the passing waitress. While his attention is diverted, Phoebe shakes a bit of Prue's potion into his coffee. The potion had been purple, but is now blue, for whatever that's worth. Which is nothing much. Reese turns his gaze back to Phoebe, and remarks the café is "a nice place." "It's crowded," he continues, "which is why I think you picked it. Which makes me think you're afraid of something." He raises his cup to his lips and takes a sip. He gags, and for a moment we're supposed to think he really is a demon. We don't, however. He's gagging because Phoebe just dumped a vial of bat shit into his java. Bat shit, people. Reese dismisses his reaction to the bat shit as "allergies," and asks Phoebe if she is indeed afraid. "Of what? Cole?" she asks, and denies this, saying that she has no reason to worry about Cole. Reese begs to differ, noting that Cole is "a fraud. A man who exists only on paper." He pulls a couple of photos out of his Cole Turner dossier and points out the spots of blood they found on Cole's carpet. He shows her another photo, this of Cole's "hidden cabinet of occult paraphernalia," and the actor obviously relishes the opportunity to enunciate that phrase. Phoebe denies any knowledge of these aspects of Cole's life and rises to leave, apologizing for her inability to assist Reese with his investigation. He stops her short for a moment, warning her that Cole could hurt both Phoebe and her sisters if he's still alive. Phoebe smacks me in the face with a brief hint of the Cole Guilt Goggle, and makes her exit.
Manor sun porch. Prue reads the entry for deflection from the BoS. Deflection is "a witch's best shield against the forces of darkness." The best? Really? Then why have TPTB not seen fit to bestow it upon on one of the Charmed Ones? Whatever. Prue wonders how Beavis got close enough to Patty Hearst to kill her, given that she was "such a powerful witch." Natalie and the Dolt correctly guess that Beavis also possesses the power to clone himself. The two explain cloning by taking turns finishing each other's thoughts and phrases. Piper jealously notes this. Natalie, clueless, smiles that that sort of thing happens when colleagues have been together as long as she and the Dolt have. Piper grits her teeth. The Dolt, sensing the tension, changes the topic and suggests that Prue look up cloning in the BoS as well. "Cross-reference: cloning with warlock," Prue orders, and the BoS starts flipping its pages. It stops on an image that is supposed to be Beavis, but doesn't really look that much like the actor playing him. Beavis's real name is Eames, and ten years ago he offed a witch in Glasgow, thereby obtaining her ability to clone herself. Prue notes that Beavis has more than that trick up his sleeve, and relates that he murdered another witch in Kenya in 1989, acquiring her power of transmogrification in the process. Prue does not know what "transmogrification" means. Natalie and the Dolt give her a definition in unison, because the writers are hell-bent on giving Piper any excuse get jealous and bitch some more.