Episode Report Card Demian: C | 2 USERS: D+ YOU GRADE IT Kill Bimbo: Vol. 2
By Demian | Season 8 | Episode 21 | Aired on 05.13.2006
Nonexistent Attic. Piper, Phoebe, and Raige whip up a nasty batch of Retard vanquish. They've all changed their clothes, by the way, and Piper's billowing black top looks like it's about ten sizes too big for her, the better to disguise the fact that Holly Marie Combs is, by now, seventy-two months pregnant. Next!
Our intrepid heroines search the second floor for The Sisters Retard, continuing downstairs when they discover nothing more than a set of vacant boudoirs. As the three reach the main hall, Ssssecretly Evil Chrissssty and The Ultimate Retard lope into view on the sun porch. Or do they? A Retards-versus-Morons snipefest ensues, but something in Chrissssty's overconfidence rattles Raige, who stops Piper and Phoebe from flinging their Retard vanquishing vials at the last instant. "I told you this wouldn't make them attack us first!" Chrissssty seethes at her maggoty-necked sister before the two of them flare out of the room, for yes, gentle reader, The Sisters Retard were really astrally projecting themselves into the Manor from points unknown. God, I hate this show. The Glamorous Idiots hesitantly edge onto the sun porch just as Chrissssty and The Retard race into the now-vacant main hall from the dining room. The two sets of witches immediately sling their vanquishing vials at each other. Of course, the five tiny bottles collide in mid-air above the center parlor, resulting in a massive explosion that sends the Manor Morons hurtling backwards to crash through the sun porch windows as The Sisters Retard are propelled up through the staircase's balustrade to slam into the wall beyond. The Ps end up on the grass, with Phoebe and Raige more shaken up than anything else. Piper, however, has been knocked out. Meanwhile, The Sisters Retard are slowly rising to their feet on the shattered staircase. "You're hurt!" Maggot Neck ohmigodssss, sssspotting the bloody gassssh in Chrissssty's shoulder. Over in the garden, Phoebe grabs one of Piper's hands and orders Raige to orb them the hell away from the Manor. Raige grasps Piper's other arm and complies as Chrissssty, thwarted, howls in fury from her place on the stairs. The Ultimate Retard inssssisssstssss they take care of Chrissssty's injury immediately, so the two vanish upwards as the camera cuts over to...
...The Hagquarters. Barely has Raige orbed onto the floor with Piper and Phoebe when all three are whacked in the face with a shuddering white mojo that apparently knocks them all into unconsciousness. Nomed and Zohar appear to muah-ha-ha-ha over the Glamorous Idiots' recumbent forms before vanishing into the first commercial break.