Episode Report Card Demian: C | 3 USERS: C+ YOU GRADE IT Kill Bimbo: Vol. 2
By Demian | Season 8 | Episode 21 | Aired on 05.13.2006
Okay, not at all, but dear God, how I have waited and waited and waited for this moment. Unfortunately, the freshly defrosted Dolt yanks Piper off of The Retarded Bimbo before Piper can throttle the stupid bitch to death. Fortunately, he had to rather unceremoniously dump Dead Phoebe's rapidly cooling corpse onto the rubble pile to do so. Hee! Piper, in a furied frenzy, starts beating on him, screaming, "Let me go! You don't understand!" As she twists around in his arms, Maggot Neck lumbers to her feet and staggers towards what had been the front of the house. Piper slings out a Hand, but alas, it goes wide. Piper finally breaks free from the Dolt and hurls out both Hands as The Retarded Bimbo lurches through what's left of the front door. Again, Piper's aim is unfortunately off, the explosion hits the door's frame, and Maggot Neck vanishes into the night. "Why did you do that?" Piper howls, wheeling on the freshly defrosted Dolt. "You let her get away!" It's because the stupid Dolt ruins everything, Piper. Haven't you been watching your own show for the last eight years? Police sirens begin to shriek in the background as the Dolt pleads, "We need to get out of here, do you understand me?" As the sirens grow closer, Piper takes one last, bleak look at the utter ruin of her life before tearfully following the Dolt out of the frame as we finally fade to a "To Be Continued" title card.
Now, why couldn't this season have been as good as the last six minutes of this episode were? Stupid goddamned fucking CANCELLED! show.
Next week (though you'd never know it from the previews): Grams! Patty! Boring Jesus! And best of all? Big Gay Chris! Pity about Maggot Neck's appearance, of course, but we can just fast-forward through all of her scenes, am I right? Last Charmed Ever! Last Charmed Ever! Last Charmed Ever! Whee!