Episode Report Card Demian: B+ | 8 USERS: A YOU GRADE IT Something Bitchy This Way Comes
By Demian | Season 1 | Episode 1 | Aired on 10.06.1998
Two very cool shots of lightning bursts streaking towards the ground carry us over to what we'll eventually learn is Prescott Street. A figure scurries through the rain beneath an umbrella and races up the front stairs as the camera swivels around and back for a glamour shot of Halliwell Manor. Cut to the interior of the house. The camera takes in the flickering chandelier above the hall before panning down to Piper, who eases herself through the front door. She's wearing a knee-length emerald-green paisley skirt under a rather daring scoop-necked sweater in varying shades of grey. Bangs abound. Piper hangs her umbrella and sets down her backpack as she calls out, "Prue?" From another room comes the answer, "In here -- working on the chandelier." Piper winces, passes a fluttery hand through her hair, and nervously splutters, "Sorry I'm late." "What else is new?" Prue snits from off-camera. The camera swings to follow Piper into the parlor, and we get our first look at the now-vanquished Prue Halliwell. I'm in shock. Not only does her bosom appear to be firmly strapped down, but she's also wearing a rather sleek and demure high-collared lavender sleeveless dress. While Piper's hairstyle hasn't changed much from season to season, Prue's sporting a rather severe bob that barely makes it down to the nape of her neck. I think I like it. What the hell happened to her by Season Three? Oh, right. Eilish. Never mind.
One thing that never changed was Prue's questionable people skills. She immediately berates Piper for missing the appointment she arranged with the electrician that afternoon. "You know I can't leave the museum before six," Prue chides. Piper apologizes, adding that her trip to Chinatown took longer than she had anticipated. "Did Jeremy call?" she asks. Prue says he hasn't, but he did send over a bouquet of flowers and a package. "What were you doing in Chinatown?" she wonders. "I thought you had an interview in North Beach." What's with all these damn references to Bay Area locations? Piper replies that she had to pick up "some ingredients for [her] audition recipe." Prue supposes this means that "the Wolfgang Puck knock-off" has yet to hire Piper. The gals cross into the dining room, where Piper discovers that this Jeremy person has sent her a bottle of port. "The ultimate ingredient for my recipe," she beams, before noticing a nearby artifact Prue dug out of the basement. "Oh. My. God! Tell me that's not our old spirit board." It's not your old spirit board. It's a Ouija board. Granted, it's an intricately-carved, heavily-lacquered, mahogany Ouija board with a prominent triquatra etched into its surface, but still. Piper flips it over and reads the inscription on the bottom: "To my three beautiful girls. May this give you the light to find the shadows. The power of three will set you free. Love, Mom." "We never did figure out what this inscription meant," Piper exposits. "Maybe we should send it to Phoebe," Prue snarks. "That girl couldn't find her ass with a flashlight and both hands." Okay, not so much, but Prue does sneer that Phoebe has "no vision -- no sense of the future," and thus would presumably benefit from a little Ouija action. Or the power of premonition. "I really think Phoebe's coming around," Piper stammers hesitantly. "As long as she doesn't come around here, I guess it's good news," Prue smirks as she returns to the parlor. Piper puckers her lips, sucks in her cheeks, rolls her eyes, twitches her eyebrows, and heads off into the kitchen with her grocery bags. Of its own volition, the pointer slides across the Ouija board, traversing the triquatra like some monstrous, shiny brown beetle as low-toned chimes shimmer on the soundtrack and the screen slowly fades to black.