Episode Report Card Keckler: D+ | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT The Search for Phlox
By Keckler | Season 4 | Episode 16 | Aired on 02.24.2005
Klingon. Vulcan. Xindi. So, what's next for our insipid, glory-grabbing, alien-aping Captain? Quantum temporarily becomes a Bajoran jeweler and invents the earring? Quantum temporarily becomes a Cardassian and suggests that "Obsidian" sounds much better than "Onyx Order"? Quantum temporarily becomes a shapeshifter and joins the Great Link? Quantum temporarily becomes the first Grand Nagus and authors the Rules of Acquisition? Quantum temporarily becomes a Tholian and schools them on how their incessant tardiness just won't cut it? All that I could believe. It's only when you come to me and try to convince me he's been a human all these years that I'm going to have to call you on some raging bullshit.
I guess they'll never destroy Columbia because, in light of why they named the ship in the first place, that might look a little tasteless. Not that they haven't done tasteless, mind you. I simply respect the writers enough to believe that they would never write such a thing unless Bermaga withheld food, drink, and bathroom breaks from them until they did. Not like I know that happens or anything. I will emphatically insist that Bermaga most certainly does not have their own Trekbu Ghraib. Nor do they enforce naked pyramids with naked Riker as the apex. ["AAAAAA-aaa-AAAACK!" -- Sars]
Six weeks from now: I come back fully rebrained and ready for more snark.