Episode Report Card Erin: B | 135 USERS: C+ YOU GRADE IT Ding-Dong, The Moronen's Dead!
By Erin | Season 3 | Episode 22 | Aired on 2004.05.23
Interrogation Room of Unsanctioned Beatings. Vaughn enters, wearing one of our favorite blue oxford shirts, rolling up the sleeves. Oh, yum. Really. What sort of good deeds did Michael Vartan perform in a former life that rendered him so totally scrumptious in a blue oxford shirt? It's really not right how good he looks. Especially when he's about to be really, really bad. He walks over to Sark and mentions the recent reversal of roles the two of them have undertaken. "I'm afraid the irony is lost on me," snits Sark. Ah, Sark. Always the smartass. Even when about to be totally tortured. Nice. "You like the electric batons and injections," says Vaughn, leaning close. "I'm not into accessories." Oh, HEE. And Ho. And Yay. Sark's all, dude. No need to hurt me. I'll tell you everything you want. But I'll need something in return. "No deals," says Vaughn. And, well, rightfully so. What the fuck is Sark doing, asking for something? The man he recently ELECTROCUTED is about to go apeshit on his ass. Pony up the score, dude. NOW.
Wendy Kroy: Finally! A little something for the gay!
Regina: Honey? This whole show is a little something for the gay. Wigs? Hot guys? Ridiculous storylines? It's about two kick lines away from being La Cage Aux Folles, okay?
Wendy Kroy: True. But with better lighting.
Regina: And more cocktails.
Wendy Kroy: And Sark. Sigh.
Regina: And Sark. Sigh.
Sark's not biting, though. He's all, oh, well, guess we're at an impasse, then. Won't take Moronen long to solve Rambaldi's equation. Guess you're shit outta luck, huh buddy? Vaughn's all, huh, yeah. Funny how that is. We'd better get started, huh? Where's Moronen? Sark doesn't answer. Vaughn swiftly reaches out and slams Sark's head into the table. Heh. Back with Syd, Cotter's sharing some still shots of the earlier events. Syd's all, dude? I get that you're suspicious, but, uh, whatever was taken, I probably had access to it, and if I didn't, I could've just asked Marshall for it. Like, duh, dude. It ain't me. "It was a Covenant raid," says Cotter. "They got the Rambaldi equation. We apprehended Julian Sark." And we're back with Sark, whose lovely pert little nose has just been smashed. Vaughn pushes his thumb into it. Ew. "Think I broke it," says Vaughn casually, putting his hands in his pocket. "Clearly," snaps Sark. Hee. I gotta say, the first time I watched this scene, I didn't really pay much attention. But having to recap it now, it's making me laugh out loud. Or maybe it's just that this is the first time I've recapped via TiVo, and the ability to pause and have the picture be so crystal clear that I can see every vein standing out on Michael Vartan's tanned forearms is giving me the giggles. "Clearly." Hee hee hee.