Episode Report Card Couch Baron: B+ | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT A World Of Hurt
By Couch Baron | Season 1 | Episode 2 | Aired on 07.13.1997
Keane sits down in McManus's office and says he wants to marry Mavis. After a couple of questions, McManus loftily stands up and says he'll make the arrangements. Cut to Glynn: "No. Absolutely not." The pleasure from this moment wraps itself around my aching appendix like a blanket. McManus asks why. "This is a prison, McManus, not the Elvis Chapel." Hee. McManus lamely offers that a wedding might reduce some of the tension around Oz, but Glynn counters that it might also be perceived as a reward for Keane, who doesn't deserve it. He goes on that Keane's crime proves that he has no respect for the institution of marriage, and furthermore, marrying two people who can't be together makes a mockery of the institution. There's more stuff that could, by extension, be interpreted as a slam on gay marriage, but Glynn's on my good side right now, so I'm going to cut him a little slack. McManus tries to pull that I-run-Em-City crap, but Glynn has the trump card: "The lobby is under my jurisdiction. And you try bringing that bride-to-be through the front door." Sell bleeding heart somewhere else, Timmy -- Glynn ain't buyin'.
A shirtless Keane bench-presses as he tells Markstram that the cops don't know anything. Markstram, with Adebisi present, complains that the Wise Guys have shut down all illegal activity. McManus interrupts to give Keane the bad news, and Keane gets in his face. "A man that can't keep his word ain't shit with me." Really? McManus is shit with me no matter what he does.
Balcony. Said tells Keane how happy he is that he's come to him, but his desire to marry Mavis can't come out of ego, jealousy, or fear. Keane satisfies him as to those points, and Said asks how he knows Mavis loves him. Obviously, Said was not looking out the window earlier. Keane struggles to explain, and notes that that's exactly why he needs Said, since he's so much better with words. After a bit more back-and-forth, Said says Keane has to trust in the will of Allah. Keane: "Yo, my girl is pregnant. I screwed her. Now Allah's screwin' me." Keane gets the best lines, yo.
Said has a conference with Glynn on the stairs. We don't get to hear it. This is the HBO equivalent of a commercial, so I'm going to enjoy it.
In his office, Glynn tells McManus that he'll allow Keane to get married at Said's request. McManus predictably gets all bothered (I don't even want to think about him being hot). He accuses Glynn of blowing him off "in a cloud of platitudes." Dude, weren't you applying the Golden Rule to Em City in the last episode? SHUT UP! He whines on that this damages his credibility with the inmates. I'd make the obvious joke, but I don't want to step on Glynn's upcoming line. Glynn informs him that Said is going to help contain the drug and Ortolani situations. McManus sniffs. Glynn asks why he didn't tell him that Keane's girlfriend is pregnant, and McManus says he didn't know. Glynn: "So much for your credibility." Not only is Glynn insulting McManus at every turn, he's also enjoying it. It's the sort of thing that just warms my appendix.