Episode Report Card Couch Baron: B+ | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT A World Of Hurt
By Couch Baron | Season 1 | Episode 2 | Aired on 07.13.1997
Solitary. Mukada is led in to see Ricardo Alvarez. Mukada gives him some backstory, much of which Ricardo already knows, and asks him to help convince Miguel to be part of his child's life. Ricardo counters that he's never even seen Miguel. Mukada tries that "let's break the cycle of bad dads" argument. Ricardo tells us he was eighteen when he was convicted, and Eduardo was a baby. Next time he saw him, Eduardo was eighteen, and in Oz. He continues that Eduardo was a hothead, and made a lot of enemies, including a Haitian. "One night, when Eduardo was sleeping, the Haitian cut his tongue out." Mukada says he read the report: "So you found the Haitian, and you cut his heart out." Sounds like a Grimm's Fairy Tale. Mukada asks if the point is that Ricardo was being a good father, and Ricardo nods. Unfazed, Mukada points out that Ricardo won't be able to help Miguel in the same way, and pleads with him just to talk to Miguel. Another thing I like about Mukada: He's not easily rattled.
Cut to Ricardo, looking into a room where Miguel is waiting and doing his best impression of a hyperactive teenager. Ricardo, with a gesture, asks if that's Miguel, and gets confirmation of that. A couple hacks let him in. Miguel is all, "What the fuck?" Ricardo tells him to come to him, and when Miguel doesn't snap to, repeats the command about twenty times louder. Miguel's sardonic smile fades faster than Kelly Clarkson's [deleted], and he complies. Ricardo slaps him, and then grabs his face and shoulders and asks if Miguel knows who he is. Miguel haltingly says yes, and Ricardo embraces him. God, sometimes Alvarez is like this big adorable puppy dog that I just want to take home. Of course, he's not so puppy-doglike at other times, but I still want to take him home for other reasons.
Hill. The speech contains "sex," "jizz," and "egg."
Cut to Alvarez, smoking and picking up a plastic baby in the nursery. The look of uncertainty as he picks up and holds the doll is just absolutely priceless.
Aaand we're done with Alvarez. Damn. Instead, we get Rebadow, which is sort of like taking away filet mignon and serving Spam in its place. Old, dried-up Spam. Rebadow says that Ortolani committed suicide. Burruano looks bored, as well he should, and points out that that's physically impossible. Rebadow says that God told him, and that He appears to him as a strobe light. No, really. He goes on that Ortolani, unconsciously or not, set up circumstances that led to his death. Burruano asks if God told him who killed him. The answer is no, "but He told me to tell you to tell Nino Schibetta not to seek revenge." Burruano asks why he doesn't tell Schibetta himself. "Just 'cause I talk to God doesn't mean I'm crazy." Well, it doesn't mean you're not, either.