Episode Report Card Erin: A | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT Doctor, Doctor, Gimme The News!
By Erin | Season 2 | Episode 6 | Aired on 11.09.2002
Vaughn hands over the list of questions and explains that all he needs Will to do is find out if any of the questions ever appeared on a standardized IQ test over the last twenty years. Will's all, okay, the more you tell me, the faster I can get you what you want. Vaughn's all, dude, you're paid by the hour. Take your time. You're preaching to the choir, Vaughn. I know whereof I speak. Working as a freelancer for the past six months, I learned how to make a two-hour project last a week. Yes, I'm probably single-handedly responsible for the company folding and being absorbed by the long arm of another company. No, I don't care. Yes, I'm very grateful to have that extra five hundred bucks in the bank due to over-billing. No, I don't care if you think I'm a bad person. I just bought the original Japanese version of The Ring and I have over-billing to thank for it, so you can just shut the hell up now.
Geneva. Land Of Luscious Chocolates And Even More Luscious International Bank Accounts. Spy Daddy and Spy Barbie enter a building and are greeted by a Swiss-flavored gentleman who introduces himself as the hospital administrator. Jack is trussed up like a Southern-fried version of a Christmas goose, complete with a whacked-out Midnight in the Garden of Good and Evil accent. There's some healthy Delta-inspired overacting on both Jack and Syd's parts, as their hideous cracker accents illustrate. They do their best to give the impression of a loving father and daughter, but as soon as the administrator's back is turned, that façade is dropped like a hot buttered roll.
Okay, so Spy Daddy's got this suitcase handcuffed to his wrist that can't be removed, not even during surgery, because it provides secure access to his money. Or some such shit. I'm just going to clue y'all in on something. This entire hospital scene is so completely ludicrous that it's laughable. I mean, it kicks ass and it's all sorts of fun, but for those of you out there looking for accurate reporting of all things medical, well, you've come to the wrong place, my friends. Just a warning -- there's going to be a whole lotta "Syd kicks ass and then does something or something else with a syringe"-type recapping going on over here. Love it or leave it, people.
Jack and Syd are wheeled into the operating room, with the powers that be at Alias providing viewers with a fleeting glance up BOTH of their gowns. Dingus can be heard in a voice-over, blathering on about how they're going to Geneva to pick up the virus. You know, just in case we're so hopped up on Quaaludes that we don't remember FIFTEEN MINUTES AGO.