Episode Report Card Erin: A | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT Doctor, Doctor, Gimme The News!
By Erin | Season 2 | Episode 6 | Aired on 11.09.2002
Still, Syd and her French Twist Of Fortification are moderately shocked. Seriously, the new 'do is scaring me quite a bit. It's very Breakfast at Tiffany's for a girl whose main goal in life is to take down a bunch of baddies with several sweetly placed roundhouse kicks. Anyway, Samurai Syd and her Bun Of Brute Force take a seat on the floor of her apartment and write a letter to Deputy Director Devlin about Spy Daddy's responsibility in the Madagascar explosion.
While we listen to Syd's voice-over, we watch her jog through The CIA Park Of Potential Mother/Daughter Reunions. She stops to take a breather and dumps her hand-written note to Devlin into the cup of the "homeless guy" who's actually a CIA sentry. The sentry informs Ops that they have a dead drop, and they send someone to retrieve it.
And then we're at my ninth grade homecoming dance, and Bob Dobeus is asking me to dance. I mumble something about "no, thanks" and then proceed to hit the floor with my best friend Kendra Thraman while the Violent Femmes spit out "Blister in the Sun." Or we're at Foolio's Bistro Of Brouhahas, where the music fluctuates from techno-hypno-spy-disco to circa-mid-eighties-grunge-precursor-pop. Syd's angsting to Will about how she used to want her mom dead, but now she's trying to save her. What is UP with that? Will's all, I know I should say something profound and deep here, but I can't stop thinking about how cute your butt looks in those pants, so I'll just say something about how you did the right thing and then go back to dreaming about your butt.
Syd finally moves on from her favorite subject, namely HER, and asks Will how he's doing. As it turns out, Will got his thirty-day sobriety chip. Now, even though he was never really a drug addict (large vomit scene notwithstanding), he's pretty proud of this false accomplishment. "Oh, by the way," he continues, "you know anybody who needs a car? I'm hockin' mine." Syd's all, whuh? Why? Will's all, hey, some of us aren't international double agents with offshore bank accounts, okay? It's either sell the car or stop paying my student loans, and I can't deal with having bad credit AND a criminal record. Oh, dude. Fuck your student loans. And while you're at it, fuck the IRS. I've been saying fuck you to both of them for years. And I'm none the worse for wear.
Syd tries to offer Will the money, even though they both know he's not gonna go for it. Still, it's something a friend would do. I mean, I wouldn't do it, but I'm not really a very good friend. Any of the three people who still speak to me will attest to that. ["Don't believe it, folks! She lent me Viggo for ten whole minutes once!" -- Sars] Foolio walks over and starts obsessively cleaning plates that are just sitting on the table between Will and Syd. And she's wearing rubber dish gloves. And she's bitching and moaning about being rear-ended by a bunch of frat guys. And I'm wondering why, even though Merrin Dungey is a very talented actress, this character is still even a PART of this show? Enough already! She's got the restaurant, she's not around much anymore -- just give Merrin Dungey her own damn show and BE DONE WITH IT. I don't care what you do with this storyline or this character, as long as you DON'T DO IT ON THIS SHOW.