Episode Report Card Erin: C | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT Careless Memories
By Erin | Season 2 | Episode 3 | Aired on 10.12.2002
"Listen, Will, the CIA wants to meet with you again," says Spineless Syd. We're hanging out at The Center For Abandoned Daughters And The Heroin Addicts Who Love Them. Will's all, whuh? Why? Why-eeeeeee?! He looks really panicked. Syd's all, I could tell you that, but then I'd have to kill you. She just hands him an envelope with his SOP. "SOP?" he questions. Standard Operating Procedure, doofus! Everyone knows that! I mean, everyone who's a double agent working undercover at a dangerous anti-government agency! Will takes a slug off his Sam Adams as Syd tells him that he's going to meet with her non-boyfriend -- er, I mean, "handler." "Vaughn," Will correctly surmises. "He's..." Syd searches for a word that doesn't rhyme with "pot" or "cot." "Smart." Good one, Syd. Will TOTALLY couldn't tell you wanted a look at Vaughn's naked heinie with that little wordplay. Will just shakes his head and wonders if he goes through the whole torturous event again, will Sydney FINALLY lay one on him?
Just then, Foolio enters in a lacy red v-neck purchased from the Lisa Nicole Carson collection. Syd quickly grabs the beer out of Will's hand and takes a swig. Foolio's all, what in the HELL are you doing? Syd's all, ignoring your cleavage and wondering why the costuming department keeps putting you in red hoochie-mama tops -- why do you ask? Foolio's all, Will just went to his first AA meeting and you're all waving grain alcohol and crack pipes in his face? Phhhthhhppt. Syd's all, take it easy, Empress Intervention. I'll toss the beer if you promise never to wear red lace in this house again. They strike a deal, and Foolio asks Will if he can head down to her "restaurant" tomorrow to help her out. Yeah. Like she really has a "restaurant." I'll believe it when I see it. Foolio blabbles on and on about the flatware needing washing before the opening and Syd's coming to the opening, right? Syd's all, yeah, I'll come to the opening. IF YOU PROMISE YOU WON'T SERVE ANY ALCOHOL. Because, like, Will's gonna be there, you dumb-ass. So you might want to rethink your whole "heroin = alcohol" stance.
Syd starts to make her quick getaway, but Will steps up and thanks Syd for letting him stay at their place until he can afford a cheaper apartment. Syd actually gives Will a quick kiss on the lips and dashes. Will looks after her, rejoicing in the fact that, due to his agreement to go through the whole torturous event again, Syd FINALLY laid one on him. Now, if you'll excuse him, he has to go rifle through Syd's unmentionables.
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