Episode Report Card Cindy McLennan: D | 329 USERS: C- YOU GRADE IT Elegy for Our Lady of Perpetual Victimhood
By Cindy McLennan | Season 5 | Episode 12 | Aired on 01.30.2014
Audience: She didn't only "find out" she overheard, if you know what we mean.
Caroline: Ew.
Stefan: If I said you had a beautiful body, would you hold it against me?
Writers: That's not in this episode.
Stefan: Right. If you held my Katherine interlude against me, you wouldn't be here, now.
Caroline: Maybe I'm here, because I know you see the best in people.
Stefan: Okay, yes. You're gross, disgusting and totally have cooties. I have no idea what Klaus saw in you. What was he thinking?
Caroline, giggling: Shut up!
Enzo: I'm lying out on the road. A car stops. Aaron Whitmore gets out and asks if I'm all right. I sit up and tell him I've never been better, and that we've been waiting for him.
Aaron: I turn to find Damon behind me. Enzo says something about Damon teaching him a new game. Damon, you said you were letting me go. Does Elena know you're here?
Damon: She's the reason why I'm here. Scratch that. I'm the reason.
Aaron: We bicker back and forth. I blah about my family. Enzo blahs about justifiable revenge. Damon blahs about Elena, doing the right thing, and being conflicted, but even I see no reason to further belabor this.
Damon: I sink my fangs into Aaron's throat and drink deep. I throw him down to the ground.
Recapper: And you can't wipe your fricking mouth? You? Felix Unger of the underworld? Mr. Clean?
Aaron: My blood spills out on the pavement.
Audience: Is he still alive?
Recapper: If he is, the huge pool of his blood is an indulgent, misleading visual, which will piss me off even more.
Audience: *Cowers*
Recapper: Title card.
I'll be back with coverage of" "Total Eclipse of the Heart." In the meantime, please grade the episode at the top of the page, and then come on over to the forum, where we're weaving Matt a new vervain bracelet, bathing him in vervain water, and shoving vervain buds in all his nooks and crannies.