Episode Report Card Jacob Clifton: A+ | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT Fashion Roadkill!
By Jacob Clifton | Season 3 | Episode 3 | Aired on 10.09.2008
Christina wakes up to the horrible nightmare of Wili's scary Botox face pretending to act caring and sweet; the flashbulbs a second later from outside help her put it together, and she pronounces Wili's fake concern and photo op "horrible." Wili's disingenuous about it: "Because I care about the welfare of my unborn child?" Hearing it come out of her mouth, she's pleased enough to yell it at the paparazzi: "Because I care about the welfare of my unborn child!" Christina, who is I guess still putting it together, bitches that Wili is using her and the spawn as PR props, and Wilhelmina blows her off, calling it hormonal hysteria and saying she just needs some water. Which is kinda funny, but not as funny as Wilhelmina Slater doing a full-bore Terms Of Endearment through the hospital, shaking nurses and aliens and getting reincarnated and what have you, screaming, "Someone just give her some water!" at anyone and everyone, and then, once they've calmed down from that insane display... Immediately chilling out even though everybody's still standing there, turning 180 degrees toward the cameras, and vamping around all fierce. She is a one of a kind kind of woman.
Aw, Daniel. No product in jail! He looks like a little chickadee just freed from its shell, his hair is so puffy and funny and sweet. The look on his face? Less so. Betty tries to justify how her brain randomly shit the bed and she sold him out, and Daniel's like, "It's okay, I understand that sometimes resourceful and intelligent young women act retarded to further the plot. But yet I cannot tell you where I really was, and the less I tell you, the better."
Chez Betty, Hilda and Coach Tony have some meaningless conversation about their imminent conversation, but then instead of having the conversation Hilda tells Coach Tony to take a shower in Betty's living room while she makes an ice cream run.
I'm going to say that again.
Instead of talking about Tony leaving his wife, or Hilda leaving Tony, Hilda randomly suggests that Tony take a shower in Betty's living room while she goes to buy ice cream. No setup, no reason, Tony's like, "I feel like a shower!" and Hilda says, "Take a shower here in my sister's living room, and I'll leave you unattended long enough for the viewers to check out your insane bod, and my dad to figure out that you're married." Tony's like, and then we'll fuck, right? And she's like, "It says right here on the script that for some reason I leave you in this strange apartment to take a shower in the living room, so that's what I'm going to do." And I'll tell you right now that there are aspects of this which I am above complaining about.