Episode Report Card Demian: C | 1 USERS: A+ YOU GRADE IT Welcome To Fantathy Thithtern!
By Demian | Season 6 | Episode 6 | Aired on 10.25.2003
Manor. Up in The Hearst Commemorative Child-Care Nook, Piper tucks Tiny Chris in before heading out to the boudoir proper for her Weekly Summation with the Dolt. The Dolt opens by bitching about Big Chris, but Piper orders him to can it. If nothing else, she argues, Big Chris earned what should be the Dolt's gratitude for helping her escape Thimon's evil alternate reality. This segues rather awkwardly into a discussion of Piper's ruined afternoon social with the girls, but Piper mildly assures her ex-husband that there will be other opportunities for her to ogle half-naked, rhythm-free gay men. "You never give up, do you?" The Dolt smiles. "Not a chance," she replies. "I firmly believe there will be one day without demons, magic, or pocket realms." The Dolt begins to take his leave, but Piper asks if he could heal her kitchen-injured hand while he's there. The Dolt does so, after a bit of tedious banter involving that N-word I never want to hear again as long as I live.
As the tingly touch takes hold, Big Gay Chris knocks on the doorjamb behind his parents. He confirms that he's more or less recovered from his near-fatal encounter with the smoky Darklighter arrow of doom, before informing the Dolt that he's ready for his Whitelighterland tribunal. The Dolt hesitates for a moment, then announces he's changed his mind about the whole thing, even going so far as to return the purloined Valkyrie pendant to Big Chris. Big Chris splutters in confusion, but the Dolt just sighs, "Take it before I change my mind." The Dolt toddles off as Big Chris approaches his mother with a shy smile on his face. "Thanks for trying to warn us about the demon," Piper offers. "We should have listened to you in the first place." "As long as you learned something at the end of the day," Big Chris shrugs, "that's all that matters, right?" Piper -- either knowing but not caring that Big Chris set the whole thing up, or simply amused by his audacity -- grins. With a light shade of mockery coloring her tone, she agrees with him: "Right."
All The News That's Fit To Fuck Me. Phoebe raps on Chronic's window, then wraps herself around him once she discovers that he's okay. Chronic greets this display of affection by offering her a syndicated talk show. Phoebe declines and, sitting on his lap, insists she already has everything she wants out of life. "You've got me, [Chronic]," she admits, "so no more wooing." "'No more wooing'?" he parrots. "I guess I'll cancel our helicopter to Carmel for dinner." Phoebe quickly agrees to "a little more wooing," and plants a sloppy wet one on his lips as we fade to black.