Episode Report Card Erin: B- | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT Ding-Dong, The Moronen's Dead!
By Erin | Season 3 | Episode 22 | Aired on 05.22.2004
Sark's Cell of (Slightly) Damaged Goods. Sark's sporting the Spy Mommy Special prison fatigues and a nice new cast on his arm. Just then, Moronen's brought into the adjacent cell, looking rather the worse for wear herself. And, I must say, I threw some corn chips at the screen all, "Okay, WHAT? So, who was that who stabbed Vaughn? CIA? How'd she get into custody? WHAT IS HAPPENING?" So, you know, the eventual reveal in this scene kind of worked for me. Sark gets up from the cot and slowly walks over to her. Moronen -- who so isn't Moronen -- just tells Sark that Vaughn was waiting for her when she went to go meet Sark's contact. She asks if Sark gave her up. He silently gives her a look of, yeah, I totally did. She immediately forgives him, saying she'd have done the same. Not Moronen leans into the bars and tells him to come closer so she can see what they did to him. He truly looks awful. Nice job, makeup crew!
Not Moronen gently touches his face and tells him that Mama Reed hired a lawyer and he'll be here shortly. Then she says something about how they can only get the Rambaldi location if Sark tells her where to get their hands on the contact's information. Sark easily gives up that the contact backs up everything on an off-site server. God, he's such a pussy. Not Moronen asks if he knows the pass phrase, and he tells her it's that famous quote by Nietzsche. No, not that famous quote; the other one. "Woman was God's second mistake." Nice. Suddenly, Not Moronen grabs Sark and hauls him up against the bars. "Thank you," she says in Sydney's voice. She releases him and steps back, pulling off this gargantuan latex Moronen mask in the process. And the Moronen voice? "Voice modulator courtesy of CIA technical services," snits Syd. Yeaaaah. So, what? Moronen couldn't get her hands on one of those? "This little trick of yours," snarks Sark, "must mean Vaughn failed. Tell me, is he dead?" He is such a little snotter. Syd gets right up next to the bars. "No, he's not. But thanks to you, Lauren won't be so lucky." Heh. She heads off in search of some Moronen ass to kick.
Ovary Electric. Syd's parked in front of her computer entering the Nietzsche quote into some interface. Once entered, the coordinates show that the Rambaldi artifact is in Palermo. Duh. Later, in Syd's living room, Jack hands over all the stuff that Syd will need to get to Palermo and kill Moronen, including a free ride on a military plane. He warns her to be careful. Syd's all, yeah, I'm on it. Jack suddenly offers to go in her place. This is actually an interesting idea if you buy into the fact that Jack wanted to kill Moronen for his own reasons. Which I do. But that's another story for another January episode. Syd won't let her dad take her place. Jack says he'll cover for her with Cotter. Then he looks down at the floor, and Syd asks what's wrong. Jack's all, oh, nothing. I'm just a really, really, REALLY bad guy. But we can talk about that when you get back. Or when you discover that safety deposit box in Wittenburg. Whichever comes first, right? Syd smiles tightly at her father and heads off for Palermo.