Episode Report Card Jacob Clifton: A+ | 168 USERS: B+ YOU GRADE IT Variations on Solitaire
By Jacob Clifton | Season 3 | Episode 3 | Aired on 2012.06.19
Spencer: "Hotel reservations on some date and then the miscarriage on some other date and then a lot of information and stuff!"
Phone Person: "Other things where that doesn't match up! Thank you for calling the hotel where we just casually give out guest information over the phone."
Spencer: "But yet more information!"
Hanna: "You know, what I should have said is..."
Aria: "-- Hey Lucas, remember when we saw you talking to Jenna and the Black Swan? And then segue into, What the fuck was all that about?"
Hanna: "Yeah, that would have been sensible."
Aria: "It really would. Because then we would know, like, one single thing."
Hanna: "Frankly, though, I'm more worried about how my constant lies are affecting my relationship with Caleb."
Phone: "Sorry, but something something something. We like to just casually give out medical information over the phone."
Spencer: "Are you telling me my sister faked a miscarriage and/or her entire pregnancy?"
Phone: "Yeah, that sounds right. I think that's what this scene is about. I could be way off base, though."
Spencer: "Well, as a young child who clearly should not have access to any of this information, I thank you. I will be drawing wild conclusions about this for the rest of the day."
Phone: "Glad we could help."
SCHOOL
Ella: "Emily, go home."
Emily: "No, I'm going fall on this sword. As usual."
Ella: "You've got a fine mind for ethics. Think about it this way, I am the one that screwed up, and you did nothing wrong. So I'm just dealing with the consequences of my actions. Once your test gets thrown out, you'll also be effed. Just wait for that."
Emily: "You don't get it. I'm not trying to be nice, I am pissed! You did this because I am pathetic and my girlfriend died and I was in the hospital for a week from pain cream disease."
Ella: "Yeah, so sue me. I love you and I consider you family."
Emily: "You bastard."
VP Hackett: "Ella, Emily! Just the little girls with no agency I wanted to talk to. Don't you two pretty little things worry about this situation anymore, the men have solved the problem."
Women: "The fuck?"
VP Hackett: "Ezra explained to me that women have no accountability for their actions, and that it was actually him that got carried away and decided to fake the test. I mean, you're just women. You couldn't possibly have acted on your own volition. Frankly I'm not sure you understand what even happened. Do you know what 'grades' are? Because it starts with that..."
Emily: "You motherf..."
Ella: "Hey, whoa, hey. Whoa. Got it."