Episode Report Card Demian: D+ | 1 USERS: C YOU GRADE IT The Short And Unhappy Marriage Of Raige Matthews-Mitchell
By Demian | Season 8 | Episode 18 | Aired on 04.22.2006
The three file through the dining room to find The Ultimate Retard bearing down upon them from the foyer, all lispy hissing and fried hair and oddly proportioned ass and maggoty neck, with the "We need to talk!" and the "How could you attack my ssssisssster?" and the "Sssso, you jusssst thought you'd vanquissssh her, too?" and the "It sssseemssss to be all about what you want!" and the "All you guyssss care about is finding [the Dolt]! You don't care about me!" and SHUT THE FUCK UP AND DROP FUCKING DEAD, RETARD. Sssshe ignoressss me, choossssing insssstead to noticssse Piper'ssss cunning little carrying casssse on the sssside table while Phoebe and Piper try and fail to get Maggot Neck to understand their position on the whole stupid matter. Eventually, Maggot Neck ssssnatchessss up one of the vialssss. "What do you think you're doing?" Piper demands. "I'm gonna vanquissssh the Noksssson!" Maggot Neck retardssss. "No, you're not," Piper carefully enunciates, delicately and deliberately stepping forward. "What, are you gonna blow me up, too?" Maggot Neck ssssnotssss. Only if this were a just and caring world, you worthless piece of trash. In the background during all of this, Raige whispers, "Hold out your hand and call for the vial!" Darling Henry, slouched against the dining room's doorframe, sort of shrugs, places his hand palm-up in the air, and says, "Vial," almost as if he weren't really expecting anything to happen, so you can imagine his delight when the vanquish suddenly materializes in his grasp. "That was cool!" he goofs. Heh. Maggot Neck, getting all pissssssssy, flickssss a little telekinetic energy in Henry'ssss direction, managing to ssssnatch the vial back by having it zip through the air into her own hand again. With that, she wordlessssssssly and gracssselessssssssly clompssss out of the Manor. The Manor Morons bemoan their collective fate, or whatever, and hustle upstairs to abuse the Book of Shadows.
Dorm Room Of My Despair. Maggot Neck enters to find Ssssecretly Evil Chrissssty on the bed, taping a gauze wrap around her wounded forearm. "You were right," The Ultimate Retard ssssimperssss. "We are on our own." Ssssecretly Evil Chrissssty grins triumphantly before dropping into the next commercial break.
Not!warts. The Ultimate Retard and Ssssecretly Evil Chrissssty have apparently decided to occupy the abandoned school for the duration, and the only interesting thing that happens in the scene that follows occurs when Creo silently squiggles into a far corner of the Library to engage in a telepathic conversation with Chrissssty, warning her that the Glamorous Idiots are close to nailing down Pator's current location and urging her to use her powers to "follow them." The moment Creo squiggles out, Chrissssty gets a playfully crafty gleam in her eye and says, "I wonder...maybe I can listen in on [the Ps] -- see if they found him yet." Maggot Neck's surprised to learn Chrissssty can do that, but agrees to the plan. Chrissssty closes her eyes, concentrates, and presently focuses in on Piper, Phoebe, and Henry's voices reciting the following in unison: