Episode Report Card Erin: B- | 1 USERS: A- YOU GRADE IT You Give Me Fever
By Erin | Season 3 | Episode 10 | Aired on 12.06.2003
Jack tells Vaughn that Sydney can no longer be his primary concern. Vaughn's all, and what the hell does THAT mean? Jack's all, oh, don't get petty with me, boy. I have something important to say, and you're gonna listen. Of course, you kind of HAVE to listen because you're strapped to that bench across from me, but even if you weren't, I'd MAKE you listen. "The fact is," Jack grits, "you and I have something in common. We've both suffered through the death of the woman we loved, only to discover she was still alive. I know it's hard. But this isn't about you. And I will not allow my daughter to become…your mistress." Oh, that is SUCH a burn. Heh. Heh heh. I love it when Spy Daddy's kind of unethical when dealing with his little girl. Like, if my father ever gave a speech like that to one of my boyfriends? I'd be force-feeding him bloody veal shanks for breakfast. But coming from Spy Daddy? It's sort of endearing.
Vaughn kind of looks down at the floor, considering his answer, then looks up and says, "If that's where you think my concern for Sydney is headed, then you are even more cynical than I thought." Jack's all, oh, save it, Agent Amorous. I saw you making out in the Dream Dugout and all I can say is, you weren't thinking TWICE about little wifey-poo while you were swapping spit with my precious pride and joy, okay? "If lighting strikes, Mr. Vaughn, and you and I are allowed to walk free again," spits Jack, "if you care about my daughter, as you claim to, then push her away. Be cruel, if you have to. Make her despise you." Vaughn's grows what appears to be his four thousandth forehead wrinkle as he looks at Jack, understanding just what he's saying. "Because your kindness," Jack continues, "tortures her. I can see it. What it does to her. And I won't have it." Vaughn continues cultivating more forehead wrinkles as he looks off at the floor of the van, wondering if he killed his wife and dumped the body, would Jack let him have full access of his daughter's body of work?
Warsaw Safe House of Soon-To-Be Best Friend Sex. Hee. Peggy Lee sings "Fever" over the soundtrack as Will, leaning against the bed, hangs onto the remaining bottle of vodka and says, "You. And Vaughn's wife. Work together. Okay, how the hell did THAT happen?" Hee. Sydney, lying on the floor with her head in Will's lap, diverts the conversation to Will. They're both obviously enjoying the vodka and very drunk right now. Speaking of which, Julio? Julio! Bring Mommy more vodka. Or whatever alcohol we have on hand. Mommy wants to be as drunk as the main characters when they embark on their sexual relationship, because Mommy's boyfriend is off trying to win an Oscar and she needs all the sexual entertainment she can get.
Mmm…vodka. So Syd wants to know why Will hasn't asked out some beautiful painter who lives in his building. Will says that his witness protection alter ego Jonah is recovering from post-traumatic dating syndrome. Oh, that. I've had that for YEARS. "After his last girlfriend dumped him by ramming a bayonet into his lungs," slurs Will. Hee. Will wants to go back to Syd's life. "Okay? You and Vaughn's wife…" he says. "Yeah. I hate her," says Syd, smiling. Hee. So do we all, Syd. So do we all. "I mean, I don't," slurs Syd. "She's nice." "Yeah," slurs Will. "Yeah," slurs Syd. Hee. I love Drunk Will and Drunk Syd. They're so silly. And yet another indication of how lovely it would be to have Will back in the picture. The last time we got Drunk Syd was when she was doing tequila shots with Agent Sean. We need more Drunk Syd! Or maybe I just need to be more drunk. Julio!