Episode Report Card Demian: C- | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT Secretly INSANE Brody And The Warehouse Of Doom
By Demian | Season 7 | Episode 11 | Aired on 01.15.2005
Warehouse Of Impending Brody Butchery. Ma and Pa Brody arrive with The Cab Troll to greet the also soon-to-be-dead Customs agents, while Raige and Secretly INSANE Brody spy on the scene from the shadowy far side of some rather conveniently placed shipping crates. As Pa Brody urges one of the agents to be "extra careful" with a box that can only contain the Destructive Egyptian Vials Of Tendrilly Avatar Doom, Ma Brody asks The Cab Troll if he'd like to get something to drink. The Cab Troll -- who's futzing with a Rubik's Cube, and if this damn kid solves the thing during the course of this scene, I am going to find the first person I can and strangle them to death -- declines, so Ma Brody joins her husband to examine the shipment. Raige and Brody, meanwhile, whisper purportedly relevant details of the scene unfolding to each other until the nosy Cab Troll rounds the corner to lisp, "What are you guys doing here?" Raige and Secretly INSANE Brody whip around, Raige ummming and urrrming something not terribly helpful until The Bulging One beckons his smaller self over with, "Can you keep a secret?"
The Cab Troll wanders up as Secretly INSANE Brody begins, "You know those imaginary friends of yours -- the ones who watch over you?" "How do you know about them?" The Cab Troll goggles, and it quite literally pains me -- pains me -- to watch this disgusting gremlin try to act, so I'll be averting my eyes on a regular basis for much of what follows, thanks very much. God! Ow! This kid sucks! Anyway, where was I? Oh, yeah: Secretly INSANE Brody lies that he and Raige are, in fact, those self-same imaginary friends. Raige smiles tightly at The Cab Troll before whapping Secretly INSANE Brody on the shoulder and hissing, "Can I talk to you for a second?" Once they're out of The Cab Troll's earshot, Raige steams, "Don't you realize that everything you say to him could change your past?" She also points out that Brody can't keep his younger self from experiencing the impending bloodshed, as said impending bloodshed represents the pivotal moment of Brody's life. However, none of that is important. What is important is that they keep cutting back over to The Cab Troll in question, and...he's got one side of the Cube done. And now there's another. And...is that? Yes, another. And...yep. One more. And by the time Ma Brody calls him back to the warehouse floor, the stupid fucking kid has solved the goddamned Cube. AUAUAUAAAAAUGH. I suppose this means I have to kill someone. What a time-sucking pain in the ass. Any suggestions? That's okay. I can wait. In the meantime, let's continue with the scene, shall we? Secretly INSANE Brody mournfully sends his smaller self on his way, and I pray to God that somehow, whatever goofs Raige and Brody have pulled thus far in 1981 will result in an altered timeline in which the obnoxiously precocious brat eats it along with his parents. HATE.