Episode Report Card M. Giant: C- | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT Velvet Underground
By M. Giant | Season 4 | Episode 24 | Aired on 05.22.2005
Out in the hallway, Buchanan is approached by the only person on the show who may have had a worse day than Kiefer. Not counting the dead people, of course. It's 6:55:12. DoDder just got off the phone with her DaD. She confronts Buchanan about Kiefer being handed over to the Chinese government. "He was supposed to be," Buchanan says sadly, "but he tried to escape." DoDder doesn't understand. "Neither do I," says Buchanan, in my favorite line of the episode. Which is sad, really. But not as sad as DoDder is, who's gotten the message. She backs away, saying, "Don't say it." It looks like she's going to get away, but Buchanan says, "I'm sorry." It hits her and she stops short, a tear spilling down her face. She leans up against the wall and lets the papers drop from her file folder. No! Not the file folder!
In other splitscreen windows, a happy Veep shakes more hands in the Undal Office, Palmer walks through the White House's one hallway, and the BitchelleMobile leaves the CTU parking lot by the dawn's early light. Behind the wheel, Soul Patch says, "All right, we're clear." Kiefer sits up in the back seat, wearing what looks like his junkyard-gang infiltrating jacket from Season Two over a white t-shirt. Bitchelle asks if he's sure he's all right, and he says he's fine. He says they need to get back to CTU before anyone gets suspicious, and asks Soul Patch to drop him off "anywhere up there." Soul Patch assents. Kiefer's looking a little sweaty as Soul Patch says, "We've secured you a new identity. It should help you get across the border." Kiefer also asks for a "clean phone," and Bitchelle hands him one with a scramble filter. "You can talk up to one minute undetected." Total, or per call? Kiefer pockets the phone and the car comes to a stop. "I can't thank you both enough for everything," Kiefer says. Soul Patch looks at the steering wheel while Bitchelle looks at Kiefer, her hair and makeup perfect. Kiefer hitches up the strap on his brown leather shoulder bag and starts to walk away from the car. Soul Patch calls him back. "Be careful," is all Soul Patch says. Kiefer shakes his hand and thanks them again, then walks away. Soul Patch starts the car again.
Kiefer walks off the street and disappears between a bunch of stacks of wooden pallets. Once he's satisfied that he's alone, he pulls out his phone and makes his first phone call -- to Palmer. Palmer's still inside the White House as he answers. Kiefer identifies himself. "You've threaded the eye of the needle," Palmer says, smiling. Don't know how he knows that. ["Also…what? The eye is the only threadable part. You just…thread the needle. Shut up, Palmer." -- Sars] Kiefer says he had some help. "I wanted to thank you for advising me of the situation. Mr. President, you saved my life." Palmer's sorry it came to this. Kiefer agrees, but he wanted Palmer to know he was safe. After observing, "This is probably the last time we'll ever speak," Palmer makes sure that Kiefer knows he's dead. Kiefer understands. "It's been an honor," he says. "Same for me, my friend," says Palmer. Kiefer snaps his phone shut with ten seconds left. That's probably the best way to prepare for his eventual conversation with his daughter: make sure she doesn't have time to talk.