Episode Report Card Jacob Clifton: A+ | 4 USERS: A YOU GRADE IT Mama Dramarama
By Jacob Clifton | Season 4 | Episode 3 | Aired on 06.25.2013
You know, just one of those highly competitive programs you sometimes get to apply for when you own a coffee shop, where you go live in a castle and make pastries. Go ahead, bring your MILF girlfriend, there's plenty of room. After all, it is a castle.
Ella: "I could read the poetry of Byron, sitting by the lake!"
Guy: "Sure, I guess."
Ella: "But I can't. My daughter is a huge mess, you see."
Guy: "No argument here, but I feel like you're making my point."
Liars: "Emily, hide these notebooks and bird supplies. Mona's interest will be piqued."
Aria: "Where is our friend Mona?"
Liars: "Not in this episode, and she didn't come to school. I'm sure it's cool, but admittedly it would be nicer to know where she is, all the time. Just to be sure she isn't planning to constantly murder us, like she is always doing."
They produce a terrifying mask with a mask inside the mask, because this is a box of Ali's crap so obviously there would be at least one of those, like a doll wearing a mask and under the mask is a mask, or a doll. The mask is like Mardi Gras. The mask inside the mask is Ali's face -- because everything in the world is just barely stretched over a mask of Ali's face, or sometimes her actual face -- but they don't know this yet.
Spencer, verbatim: "That ain't no cuttlebone!"
Liars: "True. It is a mask. Not ... whatever you just said."
(Apparently a cuttlebone is a toy for a bird, which a mask clearly "ain't.")
Liars: "Well, it either came from her house in Rosewood or the house down south, but either way it is super fucked up."
Melissa walks in, and you can tell before you see her because the temperature drops. Zero at the bone; ice-nine. Spencer is like, "Last time I saw her she was being super sweet to me in a mental hospital because my mother was solving Special Victims and my father was busy being in every video game ever made. I should probably start major shit with her."
Hanna: "I thought she was gone for good once the NATs started dropping and her B-Team plan of blowing us all to hell went awry. Remember how Mona said she and Wilden were both the Queen of Hearts on the Halloween Train?"
Spencer: "But if Mona said it then..."
Hanna: "Just because Mona said it doesn't mean it's not true."
Spencer: "Please don't dick my mind around with rhetoric tricks. It is still recovering."