Episode Report Card Gustave: B- | 0 USERS: N/A YOU GRADE IT 12:00 AM - 1:00 AM
By Gustave | Season 1 | Episode 1 | Aired on November 5, 2001
"Yes he is," says Nina emphatically. He promises her that he'll "see what [he] can find." When Nina leaves his desk, he's shown scowling thoughtfully in a close-up.Meanwhile, Kiefer approaches Jalapeño Spice and asks her if she can hack into his home phone line and retrieve his daughter's email password. I guess Kiefer feels that Jalapeno Spice is the right one for this job because she learned computers on the six, yo, and she can hack into Casa Kiefer and get the 411, know what I'm sayin'? Jalapeño Spice wants to see a warrant. Kiefer assures her that it's urgent and important. Jalapeno complies, 'cause after all, those chicas from the Bronx know wassup so they keep it on the DL for Kiefer, a-i-i-i-ght? Kiefer calls Bride of Kiefer, who is still sweeping up the remains of the teacup, and tells her that Spawn of Kiefer's password is "Lifesucks." Bride of Kiefer is all, "Perfect."
Back at Bad Teen Convertibles, Spawn asks Rick if he's going to be around this weekend. "I could be," says Rick. "Be," demands Spawn of Kiefer, gently. They make out on the stairs while something the closed captioning calls "trip-hop music" plays. They can't find the other two. Oh wait, they're upstairs having sex.
At 12:43:05, the airplane is still making its way toward LAX. Groupie Gal and Eurotrash still haven't reached the lavatory, but she's asking Eurotrash if he's ever met Princess Di. "Yeah," says Eurotrash boastfully. "But I never took her picture." She asks him to show her one of his pictures. Eurotrash reaches for one of the in-flight magazines and shows her a page from it. "Munich?" asks Groupie Gal. "Yeah," says Eurotrash.
Senator Palmer enters his wife's sitting room, where she is hand-writing some thank-you notes. "The personal touch never hurt," explains Mrs. Palmer. As if even the most domesticated first lady would ever have time to write thank-you notes without the help of a staff of forty. They start to get frisky, but they're interrupted by Palmer's assistant Patty, who claims it's reporter Maureen Kingley on the phone and it's very important. From Palmer's end of the conversation, it seems that Maureen is about to air a nasty story about Palmer and wants his comment. Palmer threatens a lawsuit if said story is aired. Mrs. Palmer and Assistant Patty listen in. Palmer hangs up, dismisses Patty, and refuses to talk about the call. "Since when don't we talk about things?" says Mrs. Palmer. Palmer walks out to the balcony and closes the curtained glass door in her face.