Episode Report Card Gustave: B- | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT The Velveteen Habit
By Gustave | Season 3 | Episode 1 | Aired on 10.27.2003
The time is 01:23:03 PM. Mrs. Soul Patch, Adam, and Spawn are doing a Whatever Technology analysis of the John Doe body in order to identify him. Since Spawn's computer is busy "doing a capability search," Bitchelle wants her to help Adam with a DNA search. Adam is all, "I don't need her help!" Bitchelle informs Adam that this is an urgent matter and he needs all the help he can get, then leaves them alone. "I'm open, Adam," says Spawn. "Send me the file." Adam refuses. "I don't need anyone doing my work for me!" says Adam, and goes off on Spawn for essentially getting her job because of who her father is. While Adam has a point, I think that the fact that Spawn's father is a bigwig at CTU is precisely the reason he needs to kiss her ass and make nice. If he wants to keep his job, that is. Spawn types something on her keyboard, and all of sudden, Adam's computer is locked. He calls a colleague of his and asks if her system is locked. It isn't. Just as he's about to panic, Spawn reveals what she did -- it had something to do with Adam not setting the "group permission," which I don't understand -- and makes a sarcastic remark about her being too incompetent to figure something like that out. "Change the ownership back, Spawn!" demands Adam. "Send the data fork," says Kim. "It's your ass. Bitchelle's waiting!" Girls? You're both pretty! Finally Adam breaks and sends Spawn her data. Pretty sneaky, sis.
Kiefer enters and heads up to the new Kiefer Kube. Chloe has a complete set of data on a disk (or something) for him concerning the body and the virus. Kiefer asks her for some other set of Whatever Technology, and Chloe says she can't get at it because she's not allowed to touch Adam's data. "You're kidding me, right?" says Kiefer. "Nope," says Chloe. "Adam's completely anal about that kind of stuff and he hates women." Kiefer has another set of withdrawal symptoms and tells Chloe to just get the data from Adam and to close his door on her way out so he can shoot up. Oops! Getting ahead of myself, there. Chloe stomps off and closes his door behind him. Kiefer is alone at last, and some weird computerized "oom-pah-oom-pah" music starts playing. Kiefer loosens his tie and starts leaning forward and straining himself like he's constipated and trying to push out a tootsie roll. His extension rings. It's Bitchelle, patching through a conference call with Health Services. The screen splits as if we're going to a commercial, even though we're not. Damn you, Ford! I need a cup of coffee! The time is 01:26:51 PM. Klockwise from the top left, Kiefer tries to maintain, Palmer enters the auditorium with Brother Palmer, Spawn walks -- not runs -- somewhere, and Felipe Hartmano issues an evil cackle from inside his jail cell.