Episode Report Card Jacob Clifton: A+ | 63 USERS: A YOU GRADE IT An Airbag Saved My Life
By Jacob Clifton | Season 5 | Episode 8 | Aired on 11.17.2013
LG
LG: "You know, it's actually kind of hard to explain Howard..."
David Lee: "You know, and I know, that this ends with me puttin' a pillow over his stupid face during one of those disgusting no-pants naps he loves so much. Just say the word. Or else it's gonna come as something of a surprise."
LG: "Okay, let's just get Natalie back in here and chill with her. Because you know that F/A can't actually handle a client this big. The poor dear things."
Tattoo girl is helping herself to the breakroom snack bar so David Lee helps himself to some awkward cockblocking attempts so that she will just go the fuck away.
David Lee: "FYI you are a rebound. From Alicia."
Tattoo: "Who is that?"
David Lee: "Why don't you ask him? And I mean really put the screws to him. Make sure he talks about it and thinks about it as much as possible and then associates the black hole of depression it causes with you, you and your dirty-soled feet and your needles, you. You and your yoga and your grotesque ear-chewing nonsense."
TOMAS
Robyn: "I'm a skip tracer, that's why I look cracked out and over it. You want a percentage of the bond? Tell me where's your friend Tomas."
Roomie: "He isn't here but I can give you his girlfriend's address."
Robyn: "There is truly no honor among thieves. Or halfway-house buddies."
GOV OFC
Marilyn: "Your wife is insane. Just because I want the two of you to clear every conversation you have through me..."
Peter: "Uh, she's right on this one? You will not be policing our marriage, thanks."
Marilyn: "Also, we canceled your gerrymandering speech. For reasons that have nothing to do with my department, and are in fact the opposite of it."
Eli: "Actually that's back on. You're 0 for 2, Mitch."
Marilyn: "Eli, didn't we agree that Peter is not allowed to talk about anything or have opinions about anything, ever? Especially a thing that has only one ethical side which is also the loser side?"
Eli: "Yeah, but minority vote suppression actually matters, so... Have you never changed your mind before?"
Marilyn: "No!"
Eli: "Well, this is what it looks like."
In a word, incandescent.
BABYMAMA
Robyn Burdines up her hair real good and wipes her makeup all around her face to look like the kind of lady who needed a child support check several months ago but had to make some decisions between then and now, when everything is blowing up. Which who knows, maybe that's how she feels and that's why she is Burdining herself upon the flames today: Maybe she looks on the outside the way she feels inside. That's how I ended up with that seapunk mohawk last year, so I know how far it can go.