Episode Report Card Demian: B- | 131 USERS: C+ YOU GRADE IT Zane's World
By Demian | Season 7 | Episode 14 | Aired on 2005.02.13
Evil blasts we cannot use:
The Power of Three now lights the fuse.
Midway through the spell, the three Anns vanish in a swirling cloud of glowing golf balls and morph down into Phoebe, Piper, and Raige. And when I say "morph down," I mean way down. Even in those ungainly flats she's been wearing for each of her appearances, Ann Cusack's still at least a foot taller than the principal women on this show. Heh. Roché's subsequent vanquish is mercifully quick, and the moment he's gone, Piper turns to congratulate her sisters on a job well done. "What about Drake?" Raige wonders. Look yonder, idiot, for into the chamber he now blazes from points purgatorial to greet Phoebe's beaming smile with an affable if disbelieving, "You saved me?" Phoebe remarks something about Maid Marian I'll not be transcribing as the delightful and still-shackled Ann Cusack rolls her eyes, all, "You hideously self-centered bitches want to get me out of these cuffs already?" Raige crosses to, like, scratch feebly at Ann's restraints or something, allowing Piper an opening to whinge about finding herself in the Underworld yet again, battling dark demonic forces sent from the flaming maw of Hell and such. Drake ridiculously finds a certain amorous excitement in the situation, noting, "Most of the world's great lovers were brought together during a time of epic conflict." "Admittedly," he allows, "most of them were doomed, but they did find the romance in it." "So why can't you?" he demands, shooting a significant glance in Piper's direction. Incidentally, while he was drawing focus away from Ann Cusack with this little speech, he casually snapped his fingers, instantly releasing the restraints and sending Ann into a heap on the floor. Again: More amusing than anything so slapsticky has any right to be.
Trudeau Memorial, formerly Andy's House Of Beef, formerly The Loneliest Precinct House In The World. Pepper Anderson's managed to get her hands on an early edition of the following morning's All The News That's Fit To Fuck Me. The main headline loudly proclaims, "Ask Phoebe A Hero." Shut up, you stupid newspaper. Shut up a lot. Pepper makes a few tedious comments along the lines of, "Isn't it odd that the badly wigged freak in the leather babydoll with the arrows and the bow disappeared without a trace?" This type of puzzled, suspicious chatter was much less irksome coming from Inspector Andy. Six years ago. When he was naked. The Doormat simply assures his partner they'll catch the freak eventually, and wearily wishes her good night. Pepper Anderson gazes musingly into the middle distance. Yawn.