Episode Report Card Jacob Clifton: A+ | 2 USERS: A+ YOU GRADE IT "Car Rental? Ashley, You Could Rent A Yurt!"
By Jacob Clifton | Season 3 | Episode 7 | Aired on 07.24.2012
BREW
Emily: "There are things you need to know. About Jenna. Like she dated Garrett Reynolds."
Nate: "Whew! She could have been his next victim!"
Emily: "I mean to say, actually, the complete opposite of what you think I am saying."
Nate: "No, don't you worry about it. I won't tell her you told me about her dating a serial killer of women. We're friends!"
Smiles all around. It's so funny watching Emily get stymied like this, after all season of her constantly bucking at Jenna or even Jenna-like shapes trying to bash her in the tits, and now this guy's all like, "I can't even hear you when you talk, little girl! But thanks for blabbering a bunch of things I wasn't listening to!"
ICE CREAM
Pastor Ted is adorable on their date, and almost insufferably interesting -- "If you're ever in Phuket in September, bring an umbrella!" he says, and later we learn that he "heard the call while boogie-boarding in Samoa" -- to a degree that would be, on a lesser man, a dealbreaker... But what does it is the way he eats his ice cream: Swirls the spoon around and around like he's building a model of a mountain for a Close Encounter.
I have never seen a person eat ice cream like that, much less been married to one and dated a second one, but it seems satisfying in some way. I will try it some sunny day. Anyway, this puts Ella off -- for the reasons you think it does, namely that her ex-husband also ate his ice cream into mountain shapes and eventually was abducted by aliens of course -- and does not do a very good job of hiding the fact that she has entirely lost interest in the concept of Pastor Ted.
Man! Pastor Ted is perfect! I would lock that shit down so fast. Why aren't the ladies lining up? It's all, "Ooh, you eat your ice cream like an alien abductee" or "Meh, I have a history rich with theft and fraud and murder and sex blackmail." Even Hanna is just vicious to him. Maybe they're sensing something I am unable to sense? Or maybe in Rosewood you have to jump through a few hoops so they know you're not impersonating architects or installing mini-cameras up in their shit or leaving Ouija boards around.
OH GIRL
Hanna's got DiLaurentis staked out, so I guess we're about to find out what happened.
Hanna: "Mr. DiLaurentis!"
Mr. D: "Hanna. Ugh."
Hanna: "Look, I'm just... I've been thinking about this for a year and I thought about writing you a letter but I don't know what I would say, except that I'm really sorry."