Episode Report Card Erin: B | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT Missing? I'll tell you what's missing.
By Erin | Season 3 | Episode 4 | Aired on 10.18.2003
In another corner of Oops Center, Vaughn walks up and sees his wife. Killjoy practically runs over and kisses him. Again, PDA IN THE CIA? Really. They're trying far too hard to hammer home that Vaughn and Lauren are actually in love. Get a room! No, really, GET A ROOM. And make sure it's OUT OF STATE. And now we come to Useless Scene #3,782: We're A Regretful Jet-Set Couple Who Really Love Each Other Despite All Evidence To The Contrary. NO REALLY WE DO. Vaughn and Killjoy blah blah about their upcoming trips, then Vaughn apologizes or whatever for their non-fight before. "I miss you," he whispers. She just smiles at him. God. GOD. WE GET IT. Moving the fuck ON.
Pamplona Safe House of Royally Hot Guys. Soymoan sits on the side of a bed, looking at photos as Chavez y Chavez watches. He's all, I knew she couldn't be trusted. She was with HIM. Then we see just who the "him" is as Soymoan tosses the photos on the bed next to him. It's a picture of Syd walking along with Vaughn. Uh-oh. They've been made. Also? Justin Theroux is super-duper hot. In case you hadn't noticed.
Commercials. Wow. Kim Delaney's back on NYPD Blue? Those side gigs not working out for ya, huh, Delaney? That show is like a CURSE. Go on it? Never work again in this lifetime.
Pamplona. Syd and Vaughn are sitting in the ops van, getting ready for the heist. Syd looks hot. So does Vaughn. They're so hot together. It's just not right that they're not hot together, if you know what I mean, and I really think you do. Anyway, Syd turns to Vaughn and says, "Vaughn -- what my dad did -- I never wanted you to have to keep secrets from Lauren." And the way she says it, you totally believe her. Vaughn just adds Wrinkle #8,011 to his forehead and says, "Well, now I do," in this kind of snotty voice. God. Grow up, Junior Officer Oh Woe Is Me.
For the record, Vaughn thinks that Syd going on this op is totally insane. For the record, I kind of want to smack Vaughn around right now. And not in the sexy way. Syd's all, yeah, whatever -- if this were just about finding the Covenant, I'd totally agree with you. But I lost two years of my life, Vaughn! Drink, everyone, DRINK! Syd wants to know where she was, who Julia was, and what she did while she was where she was when she was Julia. Hee. For some reason, that just cracked me up.
After Weiss enters the van and informs them that the laser mic's in place, Syd gets out and heads to the safe house. When she enters, slinking across the floor, we see Soymoan, waiting for her in bed. Slurp. Yum. Sigh. He asks her how Milan was. Sydulia tells him it was good and that she got everything they need. Soymoan beckons her over to the bed, patting the spot next to him. Smack. Swoon. Sigh. Soymoan asks her where she went when she disappeared all those years ago. "Why," she purrs, "did you miss me?" Soymoan just chuckles and takes off his white undershirt. Oh. Oh, my. I think I might have to lie down.