Episode Report Card Erin: B | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT Missing? I'll tell you what's missing.
By Erin | Season 3 | Episode 4 | Aired on 10.18.2003
Syd enters the hotel and makes it up to a floor without any hindrances. Why, hello, Implausibility, how are YOU tonight? Syd uses one of her many hairpins to pick the lock of a maid's closet. Back in the Hummer (hee!), one of the boys is questioning Sydulia's capabilities. "She's really that good?" "Oh, yes," smacks Soymoan. "Or at least, she used to be…" On that cue, Syd comes out of an elevator, dressed as a maid and carrying a stack of towels. Never mind where she got the simple black heels she's wearing now instead of the obvious combat boots she was sporting back in the bar. Never mind that! Hey there, Suspension Of Disbelief, I've missed YOU!
Syd walks up to the guard outside the penthouse suite and tells him it's time for the turn-down service. After the guard says, "No," Syd turn-down-services him by shooting a tranq dart into his neck. Nice. Just then, the police arrive outside the hotel. Weiss panics. He's all, dude! We should call 'em off! Vaughn's all, we do that, they'll know she has a tail. There's nothing we can do! Back at the penthouse suite, Syd grabs the key off the guard and makes her way inside. She gets to the princess's bedroom and opens up the wardrobe doors. Yeah. Because she just knew the diamonds would be there. Hi there, Plot Contrivance! It's been so long! There's a safe inside. Syd just looks at it. At the same time, the police are swarming into the hotel. Back in the room, the princess stirs as Syd grabs the phone from her bedside table.
She pulls the receiver off the hook and uses the handset as a makeshift stethoscope so she can listen to the lock on the safe. The police are coming. The princess is stirring. Syd is lock-breaking. Just as the police are outside the door, Syd opens the safe and nabs the necklace. The police break in to the room outside the bedroom, and the noise wakes the princess. "Sorry!" says Syd, shooting the princess in the boob with a dart. Hee! Syd escapes onto the balcony and takes part in one of the most unrealistic-yet-totally-welcome scenes to occur so far this season.
She rips off her maid's outfit, revealing what could be black underwear, but it really looks more like a shiny black bikini. Yeah. Because everyone wears a shiny black bikini underneath LEATHER. Gah. She steps out of her heels and, I'm assuming, shoves the diamond necklace into an orifice or something. I wish I were kidding. It ain't ANYWHERE on her body, kids. I have to watch these things several times, and I can tell you right now, it's hidden VERY well at this point. As Wendy Kroy and Rona put it when I talked to them, "We believe it's en cootchie." And, before you can say it, EW.