Episode Report Card Omar G: B | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT Oh My Zod!
By Omar G | Season 5 | Episode 1 | Aired on 09.28.2005
Commercials. Season 4 is on DVD. Relive Omar's darkest hours.
A short promo tries to recap the first thirty minutes of the episode, but doesn't really say much of anything. It's not that easy, is it, WB?
Exterior shot of a bright sun. Inside Lex's castle, Lana is lying on a couch. She wakes up to the sound of scratching. Except for some tiny punctures on her forehead, she's been cleaned up. Lana notices that her leg is busted. The scratching is coming from a lower level. She's upstairs by the bookcases. A figure in a suit is scratching something into the floor below. Lana climbs down the stairs, slowly. "Mr. Luthor?" she asks. Looks a bit like Gollum down there. Papa Luthor is scratch-scratch-scratching a symbol into the floor with what looks like an icepick. He grabs Lana's hand suddenly. Without looking at her, he says, "The Disciples of Zod." He looks up. Freaky cloudy eyes! Lana backs away in shock. "They must be stopped," he says. Lana asks if he's talking about the people from the ship. No, the other Disciples of Zod, Lana. The ones who work at the mall. Papa Luthor gets up. "Their home is their only poison," he says. That and Jack Daniels. Lana doesn't seem to understand. Papa gives an almost imperceptible sigh. He may be crazy and possessed, but even he is tired of Lana's shit. He looks over to Lex's open vault, where shelves house a bunch of Kryptonite. The rocks glow. "Their home is their only poison," he repeats. A lightbulb goes on over Lana's head. "Where are they?" she asks. What is he, Doppler Alien Radar, Lana?
Smallville Medical Center. There's lots of activity inside. MamaKent is in a hospital bed, Bo by her side. She's scratched up about the face, but awake. Bo -- a little bloaty this season -- smiles and says that she did a heck of a job scaring him. He thought he'd lost her. "I guess I found my way back," she says. She doesn't sound exactly thrilled about it. She asks if Clark came home. Bo says he's sure Clark is fine. It's not like he's ever in danger from week to week, right? Bo beams. Lois Lane enters without knocking, ruining the moment. She sighs in relief. She leaves the door wide open and says that MamaKent looks a lot better without a China cabinet on her back. MamaKent holds Lois's hand and says it's good to see her. Must be the drugs talking. Bo calls Lois a hero, which is a mighty stretch. Lois says they put a roof over her head; the least she could do was help when it came crashing down. In fact, that is the least she could have done. Smiles all around. Then there's a sudden explosion. Bo is thrown forward onto MamaKent. Lois falls. The windows were busted through. Bo leaves MamaKent and sort of runs/slides into the hallway. A steam pipe is busted, blowing smoke atmospherically into the proceedings as everyone runs around. The iZods, Angry PR Lady, and Brother from Another have found some plain black jumpsuits to wear instead of their earlier actionwear. "Where is Kal-El?" they ask Bo. "Who are you?" Bo asks. No wonder these aliens are pissed. Everybody keeps answering their questions with questions. "You know where he is," APRL says. Bo pretends not to know what they're talking about. Angry PR Lady lifts him by the neck. Lois comes over and makes a cutesy voice about putting the nice man down. Angry PR Lady throws Bo across the hall and into some equipment. Ouchie. Lois snarks to the "superfreak" that if they want to find Kal-El, she'd better work on her communication skills. Well, she did major in PR. Lois gets lifted by the neck. Lana, suddenly standing nearby, says she knows where Kal-El is. She says he's hiding out at the Luthor mansion. She offers to take them. Helpful! APRL drops Lois. The iZods grab Lana and take her away.