Episode Report Card Omar G: B | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT Oh My Zod!
By Omar G | Season 5 | Episode 1 | Aired on 09.28.2005
Clark launches himself forward and grabs Angry PR Lady. She flies backward and into the portal. Clark Captain Kirks Brother from Another in the chest, launching him back, also into the portal. This is just crap, folks. The portal suddenly isn't exerting any more pull. And Lex's den must have great sturdiness not to fly apart and into the purple hole. The portal converts into a Bee Gees album cover (or maybe it's Queen) and flies, the horrified faces of the iZods inside. Remember Superman II? Yeah, that. The flat pane flies past Clark and sails through a stained-glass window and out into wherever. It's sunset outside. And of course, Lex will end up paying for all of this damage. Clark spots Lana. She's waking up. Clark looks at the sunset. Looks back at Lana. Guess Jarnelle will just have to teach himself. Clark goes to help Lana up. Crrraaaackkkkk! He lifts her to the middle of the room and lays her down again to give her better light. She asks about the iZods. "They're gone," Clark says. He asks if she knows who they were. Lana shakes her head. Crrrraaaccckkk! The sun sets, quickly. "We need to get you to a hospital," Clark says. Noooooo! Clark notices that his finger is bleeding. That's...not good. There's an octagon-shaped disc on the floor. Clark grabs it.
Commercials. Why is JC Penney using the Target dog, minus the spot on his eye?
Kent farm. The shiny red family truck pulls up, looking pretty new, considering that the town was just destroyed by meteors. Bo and MamaKent get out and examine the wreckage. "My God. Our home," MamaKent says. Clark is standing by a dumpster, throwing away some wood. MamaKent crutches painfully. Bo says it's just plaster and wood. Their family is still standing and he thinks they're stronger for it. Tell that to the insurance adjuster, dumb-ass. "You're right," says Mamakent, not sounding too convinced. "A house can always be rebuilt." How about a leg? Bo says it doesn't hurt to have a son who's a one-man construction team. Clark takes off a pair of gloves as he comes over. No hugs? Clark has a scrape on his cheek. Bo tells him not to worry. He thinks things will be back to normal. Clark says they'll be more normal than ever: "My abilities are gone." Tragic Lifetime music plays. "How?" MamaKent asks. Jarnelle took them. Clark is looking on the bright side. He's always wanted to be normal, so...Yeah. Let's just call this show Normal Guy. I'm going to love recapping that. Bo thinks the adjustment is going to be a little harder than Clark thinks. Clark says that's why he's lucky to have his parents. They've always helped him to adjust to new powers. Now they can help him adjust to being lazy and shiftless. MamaKent is worried because Clark can get hurt now; he's vulnerable. Like he never got hurt before? Clark asks if that isn't what it means to be human. Bo -- clearly afraid of losing the Golden Farming Goose -- stutters that he can't imagine Jarnelle gave up that easily. Clark thinks Jarnelle is done with him. Wow, you didn't learn anything in that education chamber, did you? Clark says it's all in the past. He wants to step toward the future. Slowly. He plans to help rebuild the house, one board at a time. Bo thinks that's bullshit. But he doesn't say it. Clark helps MamaKent toward the house. This is the worst day of Bo's life.